( what I've become )
“What have you been doing to my brothers?” Abby asks, running into the room and looking upset.
“Brothers?” Tony asks, disturbed and confused.
“If you’re technical about it all, we are both her brothers, though a bit closer physically than Siamese twins, eh?” Half of it is the fact that they’re all acting as if this is normal, making him feel like the not-so-sane one.
( Xander hasn't had to explain to someone who didn't know in a while. )
Tony’s flirting with the stranger.
The brunette smiles tightly. “Nice knowing you, Stark,” and walks over to sit at Gibbs’ desk.
It takes all of two seconds for that to sink in. There’s only one person who ever calls him Stark. There’s only one person Gibbs lets sit at his desk. The looks are familiar, now that he thinks about the appearance. The woman has an eyepatch.
And there’s a presence behind him. He’s doomed.
“What was all that about?” DiNozzo asks when they finally get done with the man (whom they’ll probably be looking into later to see if they can’t find some reason to call for an arrest). He’s probably trying to distract himself from Gibbs’ driving, but even Gibbs is interested in the answers.
Even given the driving, Redgrave could be sleeping, seat leaned back as far as it would go and hands folded behind his head. The seat’s practically on DiNozzo’s lap, which isn’t helping the fact that he’s not comfortable with the situation. No one has a grasp on who these people are, and for a man who prides himself on his understanding of people, that’s a problem.
“Like the claw marks, that map looks familiar. I’m just not placing it. As for the rest, culprits from our side of the tracks like hunting at night. So that’s when we hunt, too.” He shrugs slightly, barely moving in his seat as Gibbs takes a turn too fast. “Ophelia—”
“Orelia,” one of the twins corrects without looking up from her smartphone.
“What, you mean she’s not from Hamlet?” Redgrave jokes, before looking thoughtful again. “These lovely shades,” he taps them, “…were designed by a good friend of mine after we binge watched the King of Bling himself, the man who was given a number in place of a name, Mr. 007. They’re actually a camera. It’s perfectly legal for me to have them. Unfortunately, you lot, not so much, so I can’t just lend it to you no matter how much you give me those puppy dog eyes, Stark.”
“Giving you a number and taking away your name,” DiNozzo responds without even thinking, and then thinks about it. “That’s—how did you—”
“Magic,” Redgrave responds with jazz hands and then apparently falls asleep in a moving vehicle being driven by Gibbs.
He’s certainly brave.
( interagency cooperation (even for a pain in the ass) ) It’s slightly worrying when they reach the newest crime scene and the kid is as unfazed as Ducky with the body. All he does is wrinkle his nose a little and push his sunglasses back up. “Man, this is worse than back in ’03,” he remarks, voice calm and steady.
One of his ‘agents’ isn’t quite so lucky; she runs off the crime scene to throw up in the bushes, and the others look a little green.
“Hey, Sierra. I thought I said, after you could barely look at the pictures, that you could wait in the car?” At least he cares about his agents.
“I didn’t want to be the wuss,” she mumbles, miserable, and DiNozzo quickly takes pity on her.
“Well, why don’t you help me bag and tag?” That way, she doesn’t have to look at the giant mass of blood and body parts splattered over the brick wall.
The quiet one—Isabelle?—nods and takes the camera. Her manner is no-nonsense and businesslike and Redgrave grins in approval.
He crouches, staring at the stain fixedly.
“Redgrave?” Kate asks, looking disturbed.
“I’m thinking.” He points at a particular spot on the wall. “Those marks? Pretty sure I’ve seen them before. Claw-weapons. Just trying to place them.”
“We’ll keep the nosy ones out,” the one who’d been hurting Tony says with a smile and takes two of her friend’s arms to join the police at the barricade.
Redgrave taps on his communications device. “Willow-lite, you there?”
“The name’s Orelia, and yeah, I’m here, and yes, I’m going through the databases. No hits as of yet. I’ll keep you updated. Oh, and Willow will be glad to know that yes, the sunglasses are working and probably everyone in the field should wear them.” She sounds sarcastic, long-suffering even.
“Don’t worry, she enjoys her job,” Redgrave assures them.
“We’ll help talk to people,” the last two add together, smiling. They could be non-identical twins.
“Get everything you can, and we’ll see you back at base,” Redgrave acknowledges, thoughtful and distracted.
“Your dad’s not here.”
The duh look in the lone eye is so unimpressed Tony can see the Gibbs behind the glare. Xander holds that for a full minute before rolling his eye. “Yeah, which means I have to stop visiting family. Get real, Stark.”
All three in the room are aware of the details of the case. There’s not much reason to go over it now. “Look up a group called the ISWC,” Gibbs asks once he gets away. Specifically, the guy’s going to bring in his people so that they can actually get started.
“Me, Boss?” Tony asks, and Gibbs rolls his eyes.
“Everyone. That includes you, DiNozzo. We’re going to be working with them.” It goes without saying that he wants to make sure that he can trust these people to have his six.
“I am on it!” Abby states with enthusiasm.
“What’s a ‘shovel speech’?” Tim asks worriedly.
As expected, Tony looks delighted. “This is over Abby, right?”
Kate, on the other hand, rolls her eyes. “Men. We’re not your possessions to fight over.”
“Actually, the reigning queens of the Shovel Speech, finally trademarked, are both women, and I’m pretty sure that’s why a lot of my dates seem to somehow get scared off. It’s obviously not the Babylon 5, because anyone incapable of enjoying the plots aren’t really people you want to be dealing with romantically anyway,” a casual voice that none of them recognize joins the conversation, and McGee glances over and flinches.
“Are you harassing my agents again, Harris?” Gibbs asks from behind them. He’d appeared almost as silently as the man wearing an eyepatch.
“Only on behalf of a certain brilliant, beautiful, bestest sister, sir.” The smile and salute are almost mocking, on first glance, but there’s something real, honest there that DiNozzo can’t quite put into words. “Speaking of which, case or visit?”
“I’d wait.” It’s like they’re speaking a different language.
“Great, okay. I do have a little time off, so assuming it’s quick, I don’t have to miss her. Hear that, men? Carry on with enthusiasm, for your lab tech’s sake!” And he’s gone.
“Never date a woman who eats more than you do.”
Xander grins. “Enjoy never dating a Slayer, then.”
Tony panics. “Wait, those are the hot women you work with, right?”
“Awww, come on, tell me! The girls love these rules, and they’ve come up with a few of their own.”
Xander grimaces at the phone, knowing Dawn can’t see him. “Do I even want to know?”
“Never get between a Slayer and her food. Never get between a Slayer and her shower. If there’s a hot guy, it’s your duty to see who can get him to blush the hardest. If it’s serious, it’s serious, but quips are always appropriate.”
“Stark would love some of those Rules.” The one-eyed man can tell the instant DiNozzo has heard his nickname, because of the sudden attention. The former police officer probably thinks he’s being surreptitious, but he’s never been in a war zone, and, well, Sunnydale is pretty much as good as. Was. If you mess up, you very well could die, so no mistakes. “And, just so you know, Gibbs numbers his. Makes it easier to reference a Rule without having to say the whole thing, which for a man of few and always meaningful words is a plus.”
“So. What’s the numbering system?”
Xander shrugs, knowing that’s not going to help her any either. He doesn’t particularly understand how the man’s head works, even as he’s got a better insight, apparently, than anyone else. “It’s not necessarily in order of importance, and there are a few doubled up, so.”
“Well, we’re still working on it. Tell Tony the girls say hi. I’d list their names, but you’d probably forget a couple and no one wants angry Slayers on your tail.” She’s smiling on the other end, he can tell.
"I'd say not to encourage him, but not encouraging would probably be a violation of Slayer Rule Number Six, so I'll pass along the message." He hangs up and it's all he can do not to burst out laughing as he glances up and sees Tony, trying and failing to be utterly casual, leaning on the divider near his desk.
“Never go anywhere without a kni—” Tony starts, then stops. Xander’s brandishing a knife he’d somehow hidden in his sneakers with a wide, terrifying grin that reminds him of Gibbs.
“You were saying, Stark?”
Main Points:
Buffy the Vampire Slayer/NCIS crossover
Summary: Better done by tags and story (it's a drabble! a short one!)
Word Count: 70
Rating: Gen
“Rule number one: never let suspects stay together,” DiNozzo and McGee say at the same time. Xander glances over, and for a moment he looks amused.
“I’d have thought you’d have put the most important rule first,” he says, and instantly looks a little older and a whole lot more serious.
Tony nods, curious and still half amused. “And what’s that?”
“Don’t die. There’s a corollary to that, I guess. Don’t get other people killed, either.” McGee can’t read him, but Tony instantly sobers.
“Guess there’s a story to that.” He looks sympathetic for once, and Xander allows himself the moment of amusement that the same goofy front he puts on can fool him when it’s coming from someone else.
“Yeah, but it can wait until we find the bastards who did this, right, Gibbs?”
How a guy with an eyepatch can notice the guy standing behind him when no one else in the room realizes he’s there is a mystery Tony’s not sure he has the answer to. Not yet, anyway, but there’s time.
“Special Agent DiNozzo,” he states, reaching out his hand to shake.
McGee cuts in, annoyed. “You can call him Tony.”
This earns a sudden, harsh stare from the newcomer. After a long moment, he states simply, “Nope.”
“Nope?!” What does that mean?
“Nope. You’re Stark now.” The new guy nods once in satisfaction and walks away.
“Stark?” Tony asks, befuddled, just as McGee pouts. “He didn’t ask me my name.”
“Don’t tell me you’ve been divorced too,” Tony states quietly, bugging Xander as he attempts to finish the paperwork. All he gets is a one-eyed glare, which makes him shiver. “You really are a mini-Gibbs.”
“Keep that up and you’ll see how much like Gibbs I really am.” The air of menace is strong in the air, despite the fact that the tone wasn’t anything other than irritated.
DiNozzo gulps, and Xander sighs then looks back up, focusing on the Agent crowding the cubicle. The voice this time isn’t anything like menacing. It’s tired, mostly, and a little sympathetic. “Stark, at some point I might share with you. Well, and with Gibbs and Abby at the very least, because if they hear through office gossip the weather might be partly sunny with a side of homicide. Until then, no gossip, no research, no investigation. I don’t like talking about it, and I don’t feel anywhere near the mood for that right now. Is that clear?”
“Y-yes, Boss…” he responds quickly, before realizing his mistake. “I mean…”
It takes him a moment, but he notices Xander relaxing slightly and chuckling very, very quietly into his cup of hot chocolate as he goes back to the paperwork.
DiNozzo walks into the room, and for a moment, he doesn’t realize anything’s off. Then he sees the familiar brunet sitting in Gibbs’ chair, and… “Are you…Are you whittling a stake?”
Xander turns one surprised eye toward the wooden object in his hands, and in sarcastic astonishment states, “It…appears so.”
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timeasmymeasure
