Battle Plans

[madimpossibledreamer]

*incoherent screaming* at least buffy and willow can get through to xander. a bit. this has become my favorite relationship to write and there’s a lot of stiff competition.
Mostly this was a combination of ‘they want this kind of relationship in their lives while also being really really genuinely happy for him’ that didn’t make it into move in circles with ‘oh duh of course Buffy would know exactly what’s going on in his head because they’re so similar, ouch’.

Main Points:
Buffy/Devil May Cry/Resident Evil/Background NCIS Crossover (Hold My Heart)
Chapter Summary: Xander asks his friends to help him choose an anniversary present.  Fortunately, they're the voice of reason.  This time, anyway.
Word Count: 1260
Rating: Teen
Warning: Mostly Xander's absolutely terrible self-esteem.

 

         “You don’t need to worry about it so much. I’m sure Leon will love anything you get him.” Willow doesn’t get it, but then, she’s been in a stable relationship for longer, so she hasn’t had to worry about that as much.
         “I just want to make sure everything’s perfect,” Xander insists, drinking more of his shake rather than continue to argue this.
         Buffy leans across the table and smacks him in the arm; at least she hadn’t copied the Gibbs slap. He winces and leans away anyway, pouting at them both, now. “Xander. I get it. You don’t think you deserve a good relationship. Let me put this simply: that man is head-over-heels in love with you. You don’t need to give him the perfect present or have the perfect day. You could forget your umbrella and get stuck with the rain and he’d laugh about it and think you look good in a wet shirt.”
         Willow looks shocked, until Buffy gets to the end, at which she nods thoughtfully, agreeing with the assessment.
         He blinks at the Slayer, then asks, just to be sure, “You don’t have the mind-reading thing again, right?”
         “No!” It’s a little too defensive, which makes him more suspicious until she grins at him. “Are you forgetting the whole ‘dating Spike to punish myself because I thought I deserved pain’ arc? This was a whole thing. We talked about it.”
         Oh. Huh. She’s not wrong.
         “We’re used to pain and misery because that’s our lives, but hey, we saved the world, Willow’s dating again, I’m finally not angsting the whole Slayer/Normal divide, and we’ve finally got backup. We don’t have to do everything ourselves. I get that not having to struggle is super wiggy, but did you ever think about it like this?” She’s still smiling, but her eyes are serious. She actually means it. “The world shouldn’t be this way and it’s still super messed up, but maybe we earned our happiness. Maybe this is our reward for saving the world.”
         “Or it’s just the intervention from your fairy godmother. I didn’t lead you astray, mister!” Willow’s got on the Resolve Face, and between the two Xander kind of breaks down.
         “I—I’m scared,” he admits, voice small, because it’s kind of daunting when you take what he’s been thinking and actually say it out loud and dare to question it.
         “We all are,” Buffy agrees. “But I kind of interact with fear by smacking things. It’s okay to be scared. Leon Sexy Kennedy mentioned that he had a psychologist he talked to because it’s mandatory for agents. We’ve been trying to bring one in and once we do I think it’d be good for all of us to go. ...Individually, I mean. Not at the same time. That could get really weird.”
         He hadn’t mentioned it directly, but then, Xander probably wouldn’t have taken it well. Like he was too broken. “Do you know what he goes for?” Xander asks quietly, curiously, and Buffy shrugs.
         “Officially, that’s the kind of thing that’s protected health information. Unofficially, he said that fighting zombies was super stressful, which, duh, and the alcohol, though apparently between the therapy and his relationship with you, he’s been doing a lot better.” She laughs, not unkindly, at his expression. “Xander, do you know why I call you, half the time? You are really good at making the abnormal seem normal, if only with ‘oh, there’s an apocalypse? this new show started last week.’ Maybe it’s a front, but you do really well at achieving that kind of balance. It’s easy to forget the pain when you’re arguing the plot of the latest Bollywood movie.”
         ...Huh. Okay.
         “Even I’m envious, and I’ve decided I’m a 4 or a 5 on the Kinsey scale. He’s really sweet on you. And no, it’s not just that he’s cute and a gentleman. He was sure you helped redesign the headquarters and when I told him the truth insisted on seeing all of your little additions and even the places you helped build it yourself, and I swear he looked so proud.” There is a conspiracy of some kind, he’s sure. Though Xander might just let this go on, because it might be a conspiracy of light. Even if he’s blushing a lot.
         “Damn, really? I didn’t hear about that.” Buffy leans forward, like this is gossip—since when was his life gossip-worthy?
         “Yeah, it was while you were on mission. The oni uprising in Japan, I think.” Willow shrugs, like this is normal.
         “The point is, when you run into someone who sees the good in you you don’t even think is there, you don’t let go.” Willow points a finger at him. “You don’t have to do or be anything because you’re the one he fell for.”
         “He’s Riley, if Riley wasn’t insecure. Xander, have you seen the way he looks at you when you’re fighting? He finds that hot. And he wants to kiss you senseless, not because it’s going anywhere, just because he wants to kiss you. I know it’s weird, I know you don’t get it because it’s a new thing, but that’s what love is and you’re really lucky.” He’s blushing even harder, and he didn’t even know that was possible. The Slayer’s General smirks; apparently she finds that really funny, but.
         She has a right, he supposes, because love has been staring him in the face and he didn’t have a clue. Probably wouldn’t have even if he had both eyes. His boyfriend hadn’t said so, not really, waiting, probably, for Xander to say it first (although he did find it fun to tease about the ‘in like’ thing). Love, huh. Funny how that works.
         Though maybe that explains the really random point where Leon had announced ‘I want to romance the shit out of you’, and Xander had laughed, except once Leon started rambling seriously (and a little nervously; he was blushing, even, and that was damn cute) about fantasies and what Redgrave wanted romantically and that he’d be perfectly fine waiting until Xander’s ready, he’d realized the man was actually serious, and when it became clear Xander was so taken aback he was speechless, his Agent just nodded, like he’d kind of expected it, and kissed his forehead, and said something along the lines of ‘we’ll have this conversation when you’re ready’ and practically ran away. Well. He’d said he was going to work, but Xander knew a retreat when he saw one.
         He’s lost in thought for a while, but when he looks back up his friends are smiling fondly at him. It takes him a moment to realize he’s grinning ear-to-ear and isn’t even bothered about how goofy he probably looks right now. “You’ve both made your point. Though, uh, I tend to be a little dense and you might need to make your point again. In the meantime, though…” he leans forward, lowering his voice conspiratorially, “...battlestations! I don’t need your advice for this, but I’d appreciate your help brainstorming all the same.”
         “Aye aye, cap’n!” Willow pretends to stand at attention without getting out of her chair.
         “You’re going to get your man.” Buffy pulls out a sheet of paper from her bag like she’d been prepared for this and starts writing ‘Battle Plans’ at the top in big, obnoxious letters.
         His friends are ridiculous, apparently he’s got a boyfriend that loves him (and he truly loves in return; how could he not) and he wouldn’t have it any other way.