Constantly Costuming
Jun. 23rd, 2024 01:18 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
madimpossibledreamerMain Points:
Persona 2/Persona 4 crossover (Broken Hero)
Chapter Summary: Sevens holds two separate but related fears.
Word Count: 1915
Rating: Teen
Pairing: Jun/Tatsuya (only really past in this part)
Warning: generally more painful self-esteem and depression stuff
Jun, sadly, can’t claim he’d seen any of it before, at first because he’d forgotten the love of his life, and then because even after they hadn’t gone to the same school for the rest of the year, so Tatsuya hadn’t been able to carry his books or leave ridiculous notes in his shoe locker or any other sorts of typical school activities. (Well. There had been a single day where he hadn’t attended his own school classes and come to do just that, only to get a stern talking-to by the teachers and principal. Jun had thanked him with a kiss, but insisted that of all times senior year was important, and he kicks himself for that now, because Tatsuya may have needed that day off more than he could say. It’s likely that his dragon hadn’t valued it because he still had no clue of what he wished to accomplish, so how graduating would help was a complete mystery. He wishes now that he’d played along to give Tatsuya at least one day where he’d been completely happy—because he had been, happy and playful—rather than reverting back to that sad, empty smile.) But from his end he hadn’t really been at Sevens often.
“…really good with machines...” whispers one as they brush past, the corridors a little tighter than Jun remembers. That will be a problem, if they’re ambushed. Seta-kun looks a little paranoid, like the atmosphere is getting to him, too. But then, he’d had a complicated relationship with expectations and praise, hadn’t he? He hadn’t spoken of such, but compliments tended to set him on edge, at first.
Outside a classroom. “Isn’t Senpai cool?” Several, especially Hanamura-kun, glance at him, confused, as if they can’t understand why anyone would be upset about such a comment. Seta-kun hasn’t opened up about such things, then.
Another classroom. “…quiet, though, isn’t he? I like a man who isn’t afraid to say….”
And past another classroom. Damn it, Jun doesn’t remember the school being this claustrophobic—but then, perhaps it wasn’t, and this is another twisted reflection from Tatsuya’s memories. The thought hurts more, encourages Jun to hurry. Common sense dictates they need to find stairs, though whether or not Tacchi would be in his own classroom was an open question. “—aloof, like he doesn’t even care about anything—”
“Obviously he does, or he wouldn’t have remembered all this shit,” Hanamura-kun mutters under his breath.
Ah, the stairs. He brushes past one, not caring to hear what little it has to say. “...delinquent….”
“People can be seriously the worst,” Satonaka-chan agrees, and Amagi-chan nods in agreement, opening her fan in a smooth gesture before snapping it back shut. She definitely has a knack for intimidation. Even Teddie-kun looks cowed (though that might not take much, really).
It’s on the stairs walking past two girls that he finally finds a statue and can’t ignore its words. “...that lighter, and weren’t there all those rumors about the fire at the shrine?” Rumor. Instantly, it feels like Jun’s blood freezes in his veins. Tacchi, no. And yet, worst of all—he might be right.
None of them—well, maybe Maya-nee, perhaps Tatsuya, given that they were the two of them given to overthinking, even if it might not seem so on the surface—had even bothered to consider the idea. The moment when rumors were threatened to turn against them, perhaps, the ones where they were the serial arsonists, but that was a horror Jun had known all too well, although his temperament was perhaps better suited to being twisted in such a way than the rest. But none of them had stopped to consider less tangible, more subtle effects, and they very well should have. Would Lisa have been as attractive, as rebellious, without? Would Eikichi have been the undisputed boss? Would Maya-nee have been so bright and cheerful? Would fights or contacts have been harder if not for demons whispering to each other about the toughest or most entertaining humans they had met?
Desperately, the hanakotoba reaches out to his memories of the past, anything to prove his dragon wrong, something that he can say when they reunite to show Tatsuya he’s wrong, that his crisis of self is misplaced, but—
He can think of very little. Following Nyarlathotep’s meddling, his memories of those happy childhood days are vague. His dragon has, at the very least, always been a serious, quiet person, he’s fairly certain, though even then he’d smiled more, at least around Jun and Maya-nee. So some elements he can say for certain are original, but as for being able to set Tatsu-chan’s fears to rest, to definitively say that Tatsuya has always been Tatsuya with no interference whatsoever? He cannot.
And it’s one thing, remembering Joker. An old, bitter flavor, but one to which he has become accustomed. To never know if he will do enough to right the wrongs, to make up for his own failure. It is entirely another to see the man he loves struggle with such a heavy burden.
“Any clues?” Hanamura-kun whispers loudly, clenching the kunai so tightly it’s probably going to leave an imprint on his hand.
“I hate this place,” Satonaka-chan’s dancing on the spot, likely ready to punt anything that got too close far, far away.
“He feels trapped by expectations, doesn’t he, Kashihara-san?” Amagi-chan, surprisingly, is the one that replies, before Jun even has the chance to formulate a response.
“And if rumors were becoming reality…” Ah. Seta-kun is, appropriately, bright, but then, he does happen to be related to an entire family of detectives.
“He…” Jun’s voice is thick. Of all things, he doesn’t want to remember the shrine, which is why it will absolutely be a relevant location. He’ll put it off as much as possible, however. As the remaining adult, he clears his throat and tries again. “Tatsuya was not responsible for the fire, but from what I could tell, few discussed that and even fewer believed it. The consensus that he was cool, that he was a delinquent, that he was quiet and by far one of the most attractive seniors at Sevens was widely agreed long before.”
“He feels like a fraud,” Hanamura-kun realizes—and yes, that’s a succinct way to put it.
Ah. Tatsuya’s classroom. He strides forward, the children hurrying to keep up. “We haven’t seen his statue here yet, but...I’m afraid you might be right.”
Finally, in the corner, he spots Tacchi, appearing very cornered as Lisa looms over him and statues crowd around and point. He’s not particularly courteous about shoving them out of the way, because this, just like so much else, burns. There is, no doubt, exaggeration here. It is a location born of his subconscious, and clearly the dragon’s mental state has not been anything approaching ‘fine’ for quite some time, so the distortion is likely to be every bit imaginary as real—and yet, that doesn’t help anything, because no matter the exact truth of things, everything they’ve seen has indicated that Tatsuya has suffered, and Jun was unable to support him. All of this had been real enough for Tatsuya. The statue whispers as it topples and shatters. “—rumor going around that he’s dating Silverman.”
Lisa’s statue is every bit as terrifying as her Shadow had been, expression twisted, and a touch makes her approach and trap Tatsuya’s statue at a desk, touch possessive and predatory, stance somewhere between an attempt at allure and a fighting stance. Tatsuya’s face, meanwhile, shows utter panic. “...stop fighting...belong together,” she purrs even as she remains threateningly solid and Jun has to push past her to even get to Tatsu-chan, which just feels wrong. This isn’t like her.
There’s no need to approach slowly, to avoid startling a statue, and yet Jun does so, touch soft and fleeting as he essentially just pats the dragon’s arm, which flicks to life, opening and closing the lighter to try to stay calm. “She wouldn’t, would she? I know she’s liked me for a long time, but she wouldn’t have started a rumor to ensure I had no choice. Lisa wouldn’t go that far,” he reasons, and—
“That’s messed up,” Satonaka-chan whispers loudly, and that’s the most succinct way to put it, yes.
No wonder she’d practically terrified him, if that thought had crossed Tatsuya’s mind. He’d gone so far as to hide behind Jun, sometimes, in Xibalba, and then after. Not too noticeably, but given that they all knew him fairly well, they all knew. And it’s a reasonable fear; it’s impossible to know for sure where the rumor had originated from, and Tatsuya was not the sort of person to confront someone and ask for the truth. Jun, perhaps, could do so now, but then, they’ve been closer friends than he’s been with the younger Suou in a long time. Unlike the rest, though, Jun’s fairly sure he doesn’t even have to go that far to put this particular fear to rest. Lisa’s Shadow had confessed to so much. If she had been behind the rumors, her Shadow would have mentioned that, too, just to twist the knife.
Apparently, though, Tatsuya’s statue is content to move on to the other concerns brought up by the other ‘students’. “How much of me is just rumors? I’m not ‘cool’ like they think.” And here he is, having an entire crisis, and he’d never so much as breathed a word when they were together.
“All you need to be is who you are,” Jun whispers, longing to reach out again, and for a moment it feels as if Tatsuya’s statue glances up with a slight smile to meet his gaze before shattering.
“That’s the friend you said reminded you of Chie,” Hanamura-kun realizes loudly, groaning loudly when Satonaka-chan abruptly elbows him, hard. “Ow, what the hell.”
“How do you not get how rude you are?” she hisses at him, eyeing him like she’s attempting to determine if he’s suffered enough pain for his transgressions. Hopefully Hanamura-kun had come to that conclusion from the martial arts pose and not her words, but Jun is hardly going to ask.
Amusing as this is, Jun really should probably be responsible and put a stop to it. “We have no way of knowing if the next Shadow ambush will be stronger.”
Seta-kun’s decided to completely ignore them, walking around to the desk and picking up a yellow tulip. “Unrequited love, right?” he guesses, and Jun smiles proudly. It seems Seta-kun might have some idea of the fundamentals.
“In this case, I get the feeling Tatsuya was a little creative and is applying that to everything. So many wanted so much from him, and he didn’t feel capable or motivated to do so.” That’s just from what they’ve seen so far and knowing Tatsuya as well as he does, though.
“Shadows! They’re gathering outside!” Teddie-kun yells, and they instantly ready their weapons as Jun tucks the flower away carefully. Fortunately, the children have at least enough self-preservation instincts to let him go first.
Persona 2/Persona 4 crossover (Broken Hero)
Chapter Summary: Sevens holds two separate but related fears.
Word Count: 1915
Rating: Teen
Pairing: Jun/Tatsuya (only really past in this part)
Warning: generally more painful self-esteem and depression stuff
The children are clearly confused when they enter the school. It’s clear they’re probably half-expecting some twisted version of their own high school life, with all the drama and pain accompanying it. Instead, it seems eerily pleasant, especially compared to the police station. It doesn’t look malicious, just a bunch of students, standing in the corridors, waiting for their friends during lunch or after school.
Jun, sadly, can’t claim he’d seen any of it before, at first because he’d forgotten the love of his life, and then because even after they hadn’t gone to the same school for the rest of the year, so Tatsuya hadn’t been able to carry his books or leave ridiculous notes in his shoe locker or any other sorts of typical school activities. (Well. There had been a single day where he hadn’t attended his own school classes and come to do just that, only to get a stern talking-to by the teachers and principal. Jun had thanked him with a kiss, but insisted that of all times senior year was important, and he kicks himself for that now, because Tatsuya may have needed that day off more than he could say. It’s likely that his dragon hadn’t valued it because he still had no clue of what he wished to accomplish, so how graduating would help was a complete mystery. He wishes now that he’d played along to give Tatsuya at least one day where he’d been completely happy—because he had been, happy and playful—rather than reverting back to that sad, empty smile.) But from his end he hadn’t really been at Sevens often.
“…really good with machines...” whispers one as they brush past, the corridors a little tighter than Jun remembers. That will be a problem, if they’re ambushed. Seta-kun looks a little paranoid, like the atmosphere is getting to him, too. But then, he’d had a complicated relationship with expectations and praise, hadn’t he? He hadn’t spoken of such, but compliments tended to set him on edge, at first.
Outside a classroom. “Isn’t Senpai cool?” Several, especially Hanamura-kun, glance at him, confused, as if they can’t understand why anyone would be upset about such a comment. Seta-kun hasn’t opened up about such things, then.
Another classroom. “…quiet, though, isn’t he? I like a man who isn’t afraid to say….”
And past another classroom. Damn it, Jun doesn’t remember the school being this claustrophobic—but then, perhaps it wasn’t, and this is another twisted reflection from Tatsuya’s memories. The thought hurts more, encourages Jun to hurry. Common sense dictates they need to find stairs, though whether or not Tacchi would be in his own classroom was an open question. “—aloof, like he doesn’t even care about anything—”
“Obviously he does, or he wouldn’t have remembered all this shit,” Hanamura-kun mutters under his breath.
Ah, the stairs. He brushes past one, not caring to hear what little it has to say. “...delinquent….”
“People can be seriously the worst,” Satonaka-chan agrees, and Amagi-chan nods in agreement, opening her fan in a smooth gesture before snapping it back shut. She definitely has a knack for intimidation. Even Teddie-kun looks cowed (though that might not take much, really).
It’s on the stairs walking past two girls that he finally finds a statue and can’t ignore its words. “...that lighter, and weren’t there all those rumors about the fire at the shrine?” Rumor. Instantly, it feels like Jun’s blood freezes in his veins. Tacchi, no. And yet, worst of all—he might be right.
None of them—well, maybe Maya-nee, perhaps Tatsuya, given that they were the two of them given to overthinking, even if it might not seem so on the surface—had even bothered to consider the idea. The moment when rumors were threatened to turn against them, perhaps, the ones where they were the serial arsonists, but that was a horror Jun had known all too well, although his temperament was perhaps better suited to being twisted in such a way than the rest. But none of them had stopped to consider less tangible, more subtle effects, and they very well should have. Would Lisa have been as attractive, as rebellious, without? Would Eikichi have been the undisputed boss? Would Maya-nee have been so bright and cheerful? Would fights or contacts have been harder if not for demons whispering to each other about the toughest or most entertaining humans they had met?
Desperately, the hanakotoba reaches out to his memories of the past, anything to prove his dragon wrong, something that he can say when they reunite to show Tatsuya he’s wrong, that his crisis of self is misplaced, but—
He can think of very little. Following Nyarlathotep’s meddling, his memories of those happy childhood days are vague. His dragon has, at the very least, always been a serious, quiet person, he’s fairly certain, though even then he’d smiled more, at least around Jun and Maya-nee. So some elements he can say for certain are original, but as for being able to set Tatsu-chan’s fears to rest, to definitively say that Tatsuya has always been Tatsuya with no interference whatsoever? He cannot.
And it’s one thing, remembering Joker. An old, bitter flavor, but one to which he has become accustomed. To never know if he will do enough to right the wrongs, to make up for his own failure. It is entirely another to see the man he loves struggle with such a heavy burden.
“Any clues?” Hanamura-kun whispers loudly, clenching the kunai so tightly it’s probably going to leave an imprint on his hand.
“I hate this place,” Satonaka-chan’s dancing on the spot, likely ready to punt anything that got too close far, far away.
“He feels trapped by expectations, doesn’t he, Kashihara-san?” Amagi-chan, surprisingly, is the one that replies, before Jun even has the chance to formulate a response.
“And if rumors were becoming reality…” Ah. Seta-kun is, appropriately, bright, but then, he does happen to be related to an entire family of detectives.
“He…” Jun’s voice is thick. Of all things, he doesn’t want to remember the shrine, which is why it will absolutely be a relevant location. He’ll put it off as much as possible, however. As the remaining adult, he clears his throat and tries again. “Tatsuya was not responsible for the fire, but from what I could tell, few discussed that and even fewer believed it. The consensus that he was cool, that he was a delinquent, that he was quiet and by far one of the most attractive seniors at Sevens was widely agreed long before.”
“He feels like a fraud,” Hanamura-kun realizes—and yes, that’s a succinct way to put it.
Ah. Tatsuya’s classroom. He strides forward, the children hurrying to keep up. “We haven’t seen his statue here yet, but...I’m afraid you might be right.”
Finally, in the corner, he spots Tacchi, appearing very cornered as Lisa looms over him and statues crowd around and point. He’s not particularly courteous about shoving them out of the way, because this, just like so much else, burns. There is, no doubt, exaggeration here. It is a location born of his subconscious, and clearly the dragon’s mental state has not been anything approaching ‘fine’ for quite some time, so the distortion is likely to be every bit imaginary as real—and yet, that doesn’t help anything, because no matter the exact truth of things, everything they’ve seen has indicated that Tatsuya has suffered, and Jun was unable to support him. All of this had been real enough for Tatsuya. The statue whispers as it topples and shatters. “—rumor going around that he’s dating Silverman.”
Lisa’s statue is every bit as terrifying as her Shadow had been, expression twisted, and a touch makes her approach and trap Tatsuya’s statue at a desk, touch possessive and predatory, stance somewhere between an attempt at allure and a fighting stance. Tatsuya’s face, meanwhile, shows utter panic. “...stop fighting...belong together,” she purrs even as she remains threateningly solid and Jun has to push past her to even get to Tatsu-chan, which just feels wrong. This isn’t like her.
There’s no need to approach slowly, to avoid startling a statue, and yet Jun does so, touch soft and fleeting as he essentially just pats the dragon’s arm, which flicks to life, opening and closing the lighter to try to stay calm. “She wouldn’t, would she? I know she’s liked me for a long time, but she wouldn’t have started a rumor to ensure I had no choice. Lisa wouldn’t go that far,” he reasons, and—
“That’s messed up,” Satonaka-chan whispers loudly, and that’s the most succinct way to put it, yes.
No wonder she’d practically terrified him, if that thought had crossed Tatsuya’s mind. He’d gone so far as to hide behind Jun, sometimes, in Xibalba, and then after. Not too noticeably, but given that they all knew him fairly well, they all knew. And it’s a reasonable fear; it’s impossible to know for sure where the rumor had originated from, and Tatsuya was not the sort of person to confront someone and ask for the truth. Jun, perhaps, could do so now, but then, they’ve been closer friends than he’s been with the younger Suou in a long time. Unlike the rest, though, Jun’s fairly sure he doesn’t even have to go that far to put this particular fear to rest. Lisa’s Shadow had confessed to so much. If she had been behind the rumors, her Shadow would have mentioned that, too, just to twist the knife.
Apparently, though, Tatsuya’s statue is content to move on to the other concerns brought up by the other ‘students’. “How much of me is just rumors? I’m not ‘cool’ like they think.” And here he is, having an entire crisis, and he’d never so much as breathed a word when they were together.
“All you need to be is who you are,” Jun whispers, longing to reach out again, and for a moment it feels as if Tatsuya’s statue glances up with a slight smile to meet his gaze before shattering.
“That’s the friend you said reminded you of Chie,” Hanamura-kun realizes loudly, groaning loudly when Satonaka-chan abruptly elbows him, hard. “Ow, what the hell.”
“How do you not get how rude you are?” she hisses at him, eyeing him like she’s attempting to determine if he’s suffered enough pain for his transgressions. Hopefully Hanamura-kun had come to that conclusion from the martial arts pose and not her words, but Jun is hardly going to ask.
Amusing as this is, Jun really should probably be responsible and put a stop to it. “We have no way of knowing if the next Shadow ambush will be stronger.”
Seta-kun’s decided to completely ignore them, walking around to the desk and picking up a yellow tulip. “Unrequited love, right?” he guesses, and Jun smiles proudly. It seems Seta-kun might have some idea of the fundamentals.
“In this case, I get the feeling Tatsuya was a little creative and is applying that to everything. So many wanted so much from him, and he didn’t feel capable or motivated to do so.” That’s just from what they’ve seen so far and knowing Tatsuya as well as he does, though.
“Shadows! They’re gathering outside!” Teddie-kun yells, and they instantly ready their weapons as Jun tucks the flower away carefully. Fortunately, the children have at least enough self-preservation instincts to let him go first.
