Doesn't Matter What

[madimpossibledreamer]

Bonus of corrupt Sunnydale cops for Joyce: restraining orders are easy to get, and it’s a black hole where they don’t share their info so you don’t actually ruin your ex’s life
Jotaro is definitely getting a headache from talking so much.  He's mostly saying his bluntest thoughts out loud. Josuke probably insisted he get in the habit, though.  Also he's definitely repeating something he's heard Holly say.

Main Points:
Jojo's Bizarre Adventure/Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Summary: They're ready to start investigating the latest Sunnydale mystery (and have an important conversation along the way).
Word Count: 520
Rating: Teen

 

        In Sunnydale, you do not invite people in, especially not after dark.  You also don’t wait for an invitation.  It’s not dark yet, but it’s not not-dark either, as the sunset paints the scenery in deceptively friendly bright, cheerful colors.
        Dr. Kujo might be a little rude about it, but it does appear that he gets it without even being a native, because he doesn’t wait for Joyce to even say a word once she opens the door, just shoves past.  Then again, he might just be that much in a hurry.
        Oddly, Joyce doesn’t seem pleased to see any of them, which is really weird because she’s the one who texted her ex.  It’d be really weird if she didn’t expect him to show up.
        “Where is it, Mom?” Buffy asks, voice still a little cold.
        “It’s not in the kitchen,” she calls after the man.
        “I don’t want to miss anything,” he growls back, implacable. 
        “It’s in the basement,” she explains with a sigh.  “I suppose I should’ve expected this.”
        “Don’t worry; we’re just trying to be thorough so we don’t have to come back later,” Buffy states dismissively, heading down.
        “Buffy—” Joyce starts, but the Slayer doesn’t stop, doesn’t respond.
        “I’m guessing calling her a freak didn’t help,” Willow offers, hesitant, and Ms Summers groans.
        “I knew it was the wrong thing to say, but I—I want things to go back to normal, and I keep trying to help, to fix things, and I don’t know what I’m doing.  There aren’t books on what to do in this situation.”
        Xander winces.  “Believe me, I know a lot about accidentally saying words.”
        Ms Summers smiles gratefully.
        “I’ve been wanting things to be normal again since I was seventeen years old,” Dr. Kujo announces bluntly in a gruff baritone—how is someone so tall and muscly so sneaky?  “I’m sure Buffy is the same.  But wishing won’t change a thing.  If Mom were here, she’d have some lecture about accepting people for who they are, not for who you want them to be.”
        Giles interrupts.  “While I appreciate and agree with the sentiment, I have to correct one thing—wishes are indeed possible and also very, very dangerous.  Various types of wish demons, also known as vengeance demons, exist, and tend to be very literal when following requests.  They also do not have the best interests of humanity at heart.”
        Surprisingly, Buffy’s dad doesn’t interrupt back, just listens until Giles is done.  Then he points an accusing finger at Joyce.  “If you do that, I will punch you.”
        “I’m sure there’s no need for that,” Giles insists, though he, too, looks a little irritated at the thought, ready to defend the Buffy that exists now.  “Just avoid using the word ‘wish’ in the future.”
        Fortunately, Joyce doesn’t disagree, just swallows.
        “So, um, do I have to worry about rabies from zombie cats, or just zombie cooties?” Buffy’s voice calls up the stairs, and the marine biologist just turns to Giles silently.
        “That would depend on what is causing its undead state,” Giles responds, and they hurry downstairs.