Sea of the Unconscious Part 5

[madimpossibledreamer]

Main Points:
Persona 4 Sea of the Unconscious
Summary: Yosuke was not part of the original investigation team. In fact, he wasn't even part of their world. He was a huge fanboy. And then he fell into Inaba, and his life changed forever...
Really old, so not perfectly written, and it was during my FONTS EXIST phase. Slightly inspired by Chisotahn's Ten Steps fic. The entire concept is a little chuuni/Gary Stu. I don't think it would be bad with some tweaking, but that's tweaking i don't really want to do, so we've got this instead. I honestly don't remember this chapter being as dark as it is and I think the understated way it just exists is well done, but...brr.  Beware the warning.
Takuma is my alternate Magician.
Word Count: 767
Rating: teen
warning: this is the depressed yosuke and references attempted suicide, so keep that in mind before you decide to read or not (and a little bit on whether or not you listen to the music of the fic as it's a little depressed lyric-wise too).  also if you need help don't hesitate to reach out.  The volunteers and workers at the help lines...this is their mission, they want to help people like you.

          The next floor looked more like a bunch of offices, all little rooms with doors. The leader made a decision. "Teams of two, let's search this area. I'm thinking we're looking for another Yosuke."
          "How come there's so many Shadows?" Takuma complained, wiping the sweat off his face with the back of his arm.
          "Well...I had a lot, but this is different. And the Shadows don’t appear to be trying to confront Yosuke with this stuff. It feels like it’s just a bunch of different fragments of him leading to a scary version of his Persona trying to murder us all," Rise responded.
          Souji didn't bother. He didn't want to tell them all that if he'd ended up having a Shadow, which he luckily never had, he'd end up with several, like Yosuke.
          Unlike the other floors, this one came off as very impersonal, shiny and new, the kind that impressed crowds and made those who worked there feel lonely and cut off from outside contact.
          As they started through the rooms, Takuma muttering behind a silent Souji, the voices started seeping through the walls again.
go off and play by yourself; you're a big boy
don't have the courage to do it
I'm not useful to anyone no one cares about me
I might as well be somewhere else for as much as people care
I don't have the time right now
That's right! something screamed back. You never have time for me you never will! You hate me. You don't...you don't care...never did...
          "I found him," Naoto-kun's voice drifted over the connection, and Souji headed in her direction.
          This version of Yosuke had also been crying. The yellow eyes were softer, vulnerable. His headphones were broken, curled around his neck as always. He was still wearing pajamas, orange cat pajama bottoms with a black shirt that was a little too big for him.
          "Tell us what is going on," Naoto-kun commanded promptly upon Souji's arrival, as if she had been waiting for him to begin interrogation.
          "I'd love to help you," he answered in a voice he tried and failed to control. It cracked with the effort of keeping the tears inside. "But I've got no idea. Why should I? I'm useless. I'm a failure. Can't even help myself." He buried his head in his knees, his next words muffled by the fabric and the thickness of his voice. "Can't even do it. I mean, you'd be happy with one less Shadow running around, right? I'm nothing. I'm less than nothing. I tried to help you guys, I really did, but I couldn't. Fail even at that, huh?"
          They exchanged glances. Most looked confused. Souji and Naoto's eyes widened in horror.
          The detective leaned forward and pushed the headphones and hair out of the way, revealing an angry looking welt across his neck-like a garrote.
          "I tried to hang myself. Or choke myself, or, you know. With my headphones. They're pretty expensive. I figured they'd hold up longer than my courage anyway. But nope. Broke. I'm stuck here, trapped in this existence where I run around in circles and every day gets just a little bit darker."
          Souji moved forward, put a hand on this Shadow Yosuke's shoulder. This one looked up and the smallest, saddest of bright smiles crossed the Shadow's face-but it was a look of hope.
          They were interrupted by the intercom.
          "Don't pay attention to our employee on the third floor. He's useless. But then, he's new, isn't he? Nobody’s bothered to train him properly because he’s just a waste of space." This Shadow Yosuke's face crumpled again, and Souji gave him the briefest of hugs before moving for the stairs again. Chie patted him sympathetically on the way out. "Anyway, I think you'll be intrigued by our next offer, so off to the fourth floor with you, and try not to get trampled by eager shoppers. They're a hazard during this season."
          They'd never been attacked on the stairs before, but that was no reason to get careless. Especially with that announcement. Shadow Yosuke, he thought grimly, would probably consider that enough of a warning that if they were caught off guard, it was their own fault.
          "Keep on your guard on the stairs," he warned, then looked down at this Yosuke one more time. "Just remember that you are not alone, and there are people who care about you. Don't give up. Keep yourself together, because we will be back for you."
          He honestly couldn’t tell whether he’d made a difference or not, but they had to move on.