Prince of Persia: Sands of Time Game Review/Commentary 68

[madimpossibledreamer]

I’m really curious as to how this relates to Forgotten Sands.  ‘Cause this beginning area looks like it, but I also wasn’t paying a ton of attention to the plot because I didn’t know what was happening.  (So what’s your excuse this time?  Other than, y’know, let’s playing, because that’s a pretty good one.  It happens to Let’s Players all the time.) 

Yeah, wallrun that way.  That’s exactly what I wanted you to do, Prince.  Scum. 

You know what?  Let’s re-save.  Done.  I’ll start the story from here next time. [Prince] 

Because I don’t want to have to redo all of that if I fail.  To get more health. 

Do I have…I do.  All right.  I can’t do that. 

And this time I don’t need the water.  Because you know what?  I’m all healed. 

Right here, maybe?  Yep.  Woah.  That was actually a bit far and I wasn’t supposed to catch that. 

I do have to deal with stupid flying rodents again, but y’know, them’s the breaks.  The worst part is when they’re too wary to actually go for me. 

…That time it was three.  For some reasons one of the times they were like “two is enough.  We got ya.  We will now destroy you.”  Like, what?  (And by that, I mean they weren’t scared off until there was only two of them left.)  I mean, there were only three of them and they were like “we’re not leaving until there’s two of you”, and I’m like, “wait, what?”  I mean, two of them. 

Hi.  How did you…Did you die?  I think you might have died. 

Ohhhhh.  Well, this is going to be hard.  So, wallrun and then jump and then…don’t…die.  No no no, that didn’t happen. [Prince] 

Well, at least it saves us here.  And that one was actually not too bad. 

Oh hey, look, more dudes.  Farah!  Come back! [Prince]  …Why are they all ignoring her?!?  Why is she ignoring them? 

Woah!  How did I dodge that??  Ow.  C’mon, get up. 

Apparently—I somehow dodged two of them and got them both.  I elbowed one and hit another and I’m just like, what, how?  What just happened? 

Oh.  I guess I’m not going back that way. 

And I did not go for the water—I totally did not notice this here.  That was intelligent. 

I mean, I got that far.  There’s a lot of these wall jumps which don’t tend to like me. 

Wow, 93%?  I’m getting close, man.  Which is kinda nuts. 

Uhh…right.  Checking that way…and then jump and then jump again, there we go.  Can I not…?  Why can’t I go over here and then not…weird.  I don’t know what I’m doing tbh. 

I die on top of the water.  This is… Wait, that’s not right. [Prince] This is the most ironic fate. 

C’mon.  Turn around.  There we go. 

I don’t know what to do from here.  Oh, wait, maybe I jump this way? 

Nope.  I just die on top of the water again. 

No no no, that didn’t happen.  May I start again? [Prince]  You can, but you’re a terrible storyteller, man.  I mean, come on.  You keep messing up that badly…  (I mean, how easy is it to not say “I fell to my death on top of this water, wait, that’s not right”?)  Come on, man. 

Oh.  Fact of the matter is that I am an idiot. 

C’mon, turn around.  There we go. 

I would never have thought of jumping that direction. 

C’mon.  Go this way. 

I mean, I’m glad that that’s a thing that you can recover yourself from me being an idiot. 

Up.  Not that way, up. 

Really?  Prince?  …Uh, okay, fine. 

Oh, for goodness’ sake, Prince, what are you doing?  Prince.  That didn’t happen. [Prince]  Arrrgh.  Prince.  Getting him to go the right direction is looking kind of hard. 

The music right now is super ominous.  It’s not even really music.  (It’s this constant, I dunno.  Metallic sound.  Plus just creepy winds.  This I think is the first time in the whole game and it’s definitely putting me on edge.)  

Is that…?  Okay, how do you get him to go the way you want him to? 

Prince!  Prince, no!  That’s not how it happened. [Prince]  No, it’s not, and I blame you for being an awful storyteller.  Seriously, what are you thinking?  Maybe if I do this, you’ll…can I change the camera angle now? 

…*sigh* Prince.  Wait.  That’s not— [Prince] Prince!  How?!?  No, please.  Okay.  So back is not the right button. 

Like, seriously, this is some Resident Evil music.  (Or maybe Silent Hill, with the siren only it’s more like a seriously ominous foghorn, except that’s not quite right either…) 

Okay, seriously, getting him to go in the right direction here is fairly easy. 

Uhh.  Well, I’m glad you caught that, but also, what?  Prince…  Didn’t happen. [Prince]  I like how you’re getting annoyed, but.  It’s partially your fault.  I wanna go this direction and you’re like ‘naah, I dunno.’ 

(Maybe a car horn?  It sounds kind of like a car horn that never ends.  Except it does, but a lot longer than someone could lean on it.) 

Now you hurt yourself.  Prince. 

I mean, there’s water right there, but don’t you wish you were skinny enough to fit in the places Farah could get to?  (Then again, it might be super unhealthy to try to achieve that, given some of those spots.  Maybe what you need isn’t a diet, given that you’re obviously in shape with all the parkour.  Maybe you just need a better body image.) 

Ohhh, thank everything.  Okay, for the record, it’s right here.  And by right, I mean the direction.  Because oh my word he did not want to go anywhere. 

Oh great.  More of you.  Get away.  Stupid rodents. 

Ask not for whom the bell tolls.  (Still trying to work out that “soundtrack” sound effect.) 

Okay, I think I’m supposed to wallrun up this, but…yeah, I don’t think there’s any way I’m going that way, even though it looks like I could maybe do that, so. 

That was super easy.  It seems…it’s nice when the controls actually function.