Stress Testing

[madimpossibledreamer]

Happy 4th (or just hope you had a great day)!
~Dreamer~

Main Points:
Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Iron Man Crossover (Self-Made Hero)
Summary: dealing with the imposter syndrome
Word Count: 475
Rating: Gen

         From the outside, Tony Stark’s life seems ideal.  He’s a superhero.  He’s ridiculously rich.  He gets the best lines, he’s a genius with a high IQ and he’s an awesome engineer, he gets to live the fast life with the cars and the women and he gets to fly—
         Yeah, okay, there was that one comic about him being an alcoholic, but still.
         What you don’t see from the outside is that it’s not that he chooses to do these things.  What you don’t see is that he’s a shark.  What you don’t see is that he’s always trying to drive faster, fly higher, because he might finally be able to outrun his father’s words.  What you don’t see is that he’s constantly acting on his impulses and designing things and filling his life because if he stops moving, he dies.  (Or, wait, is that supposed to be a whale—doesn’t really matter in the end, because if he stops moving, his thoughts eat him alive.)
         What you don’t see is that when he says he’s earned this, he means he really hasn’t, could never, because according to Howard Stark, nothing will ever be enough.  If he pounds the metal hard enough, types fast enough, he can’t hear the sound of his own thoughts.
         Adding that on top of yet another father figure who will never tell his son that he’s loved, or even has done a good job, a kid whose academic successes had only ever been chalked up to luck, cheating, or the new occupants of his head, even by his best friend, a general identity crisis brought on by their situation and the typical teenage issues, a lack of a clearly defined role in the team (consultant, says a voice entirely ignored), and a general devaluation of the kind of people skills Pepper would probably headhunt for, and it’s no wonder that the kid has issues compounded by the rest of their issues.
         So they set up a test of sorts.  Over the course of a week, slowly stepping back and letting Xander go.  They promise that they’ll help out if needed, but when Xander asks frantically, Tony just asks him questions and walks him through the process to the required answer.  Slowly he gains his confidence, puts together small shop projects, and it’s a joy to see.  As a team, they have to trust each other, to have each other’s backs.
         Xander’s every bit as important a project as the Iron Man armor, and they will make him stronger than iron.  Flesh and blood.
         While they’re at it, they should maybe get in touch with the other universes, because if they can give the others a feeling of belonging, of home, well, that’s worth it.  Plus they can steer them clear of the problems, give them all new mistakes to make.