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madimpossibledreamerMain Points:
Jojo's Bizarre Adventure/Buffy the Vampire Slayer AU
Chapter Summary: Fitz, Jojo, and Darling meet von Stroheim's partner.
Word Count: 1122
Rating: Gen
Note: HERE THERE PROBABLY BE BUFFY/JJBA SPOILERS.
“Hey, is this a scheduled group hug, or can anyone join?” a new voice asks, except—it’s not really new, is it? It sounds familiar, and given the coincidence from earlier he’s half certain he’s right here, too, but he doesn’t need to confirm that right now.
Stroheim reaches out and pulls both the newcomer and a protesting Fitz in, of which Johan definitely approves. Fitz, being a Brit, probably hasn’t gotten enough hugs in his life, and Darling, well. She needs all the hugs she can get, because she’s probably deprived, and everyone needs more hugs.
“It was scheduled, but…” and Johan pauses for effect, staring down at his hand like he’s holding a page of paper and is the bouncer at some club or something, “…would you look at that, it looks like you’re on the list of invitees. You’re good.”
The newcomer grins and glances at von Stroheim. “I like this guy. Can we keep him?”
“He’s offered. I don’t see why not,” the blonde points out.
Fitz definitely growls. “Because you can’t own a human being.”
Xander places a calming, warning hand on his friend’s shoulder. “I think someone needs to tell you about metaphors and other literary…things.”
Green eyes turn to him, scandalized, and the Brit repeats incredulously, “Things?”
Johan shrugs, a smile playing around behind the serious expression. “I only learned a lot of things secondhand from Will.” He lets Speedwagon fume for a bit, directs the anger toward himself, and then speaks again. “I’m sorry I didn’t warn you, Fitz, but I’ve been fighting for a long time. We didn’t have a lot of time to react.” He casually leans against the nearby wall. For whatever reason, it’s as easy to put one of his feet in a yoga-like pose as he’d failed miserably at yoga in years past, but it doesn’t really matter right now and he doesn’t really care. “Besides, if I’d been wrong, LJ and Whisper would’ve been necessary. You were my backup plan.”
Stroheim nods approvingly, probably at the strategy involved, while Fitz doesn’t seem entirely appeased. Yet.
“How the hell do you just…just risk your life on a feeling?” the blond snarls eventually, hands balled into fists.
“I’ve risked my life on less,” he answers easily, and then realizes by the fierce flash in his friend’s eyes that’s the wrong response. “I managed to survive this long.”
“I have no clue how,” Fitz mutters, clinging to his anger jealously.
Xander just puts a friendly hand on his shoulder. “I’ve been lucky. I have the survival instincts of a Sunnydale native. But most importantly—I’m not alone. I have my friends and allies who’ve got my back.”
“Damn it, Jojo,” the blond mutters, burying his head in his hands.
“If you’re in the middle of a panic attack, we’re at our destination, so you can at least sit,” von Stroheim’s partner points out helpfully, pulling out a chair, into which Speedwagon sinks, barely aware. He frowns. “Wait—Jojo—”
“The name you’ll probably recognize is Johan Joestar, yes. You wouldn’t happen to be related to a mayor of New York City, would you?” He’s grinning, because he half knows the answer already.
“Damn,” and he’s grinning. “Non-hostile #2, huh? You sure know how to pick ‘em, Cap. Robin Brown, nicknamed ‘Hood’ because my partner,” he nudges her, and she barely moves, “…has a weird sense of humor.”
“And, likely, it has something to do with that bow you’ve got dismantled at your back,” Fitz joins in, and Xander blinks and immediately glances at Robin. How had he missed that? Buffy would be jealous. She’d want a nice, stylish bag to carry all her weapons, too.
“Yeah, it does. Welcome back to the world of the unpanicking,” he chuckles. “I use hamon and a bow. It wouldn’t work half as well without natural oil.”
“Have you run that by the Major?” Johan responds automatically, and waves it off when he just gets blank stares. “It’s a reference, don’t worry about it. That’s pretty cool.”
“Captain Beefheart von Stroheim,” she introduces herself. “I am here by leave of the German government.”
Jojo narrows his eyes before realizing why. “Oh, yeah, isn’t Germany more aware of the supernatural than most nations on average? Since…the Grimm brothers, or something? And I vaguely remember something about taking up a Van Helsing style crusade to make up for the World Wars…”
He notices Fitz has completely lost his angry look, replaced by sheer impressed confusion.
Xander sighs. “I may have slightly misrepresented myself at your bookstore. I did read growing up, other than comic books, but most of that was, well. Not under protest, but not entirely voluntary, either. A means of survival. Your average Malleus malificarum? Well, actually, I wasn’t allowed to read that one, because I have this weird tendency to set things on fire or summon things or other nasty consequences when I read texts like that out loud, but books like that, history and specifics of the supernatural, I’ve read and practically memorized.”
Fitz flushes for some reason. Probably because he’s realizing he’s underestimated Johan again, not that Xander hadn’t enjoyed it. “What languages do you speak, Jojo?” He’s definitely a little bit in awe.
He laughs. “Speak? English, British, and…” He stops, then continues, slower, “Oddly enough, Japanese. And a little Italian, ‘cause of bisnonna Suzi Q and I don’t even want to count how many greats grandmother Lisa Lisa. Though she is pretty great.” He pauses, letting that sink in, because it’s still a little shocking, all this stuff he doesn’t realize he actually knows through Pretender. “But mostly, I don’t speak languages because bad things happen when I do.”
The blond raises an eyebrow, and he grins and waggles his in return and continues.
“Mostly, I read dead languages. Latin, Sumerian, Egyptian, Ancient Chinese, Aklo, Aratuscan, Primordial Sanskrit. A few things in other languages. I probably couldn’t be conversational with any of them if I wanted to, because I’m much less likely to know the word for ‘pizza’ than I am the words for ‘human sacrifice’.”
“Because any of the languages you listed are likely to have the word for ‘pizza’,” Fitz mutters.
“They don’t? Savages!” he reacts with shock, holding his hand over his heart, and that causes Darling to laugh.
A good sound. She probably hasn’t laughed enough in her life. Which he’ll fix as much as he can.
“I’m noticing a similarity between you and our newfound allies,” Speedwagon remarks, ignoring the last comment. “You seem to want to hold all your strategy meetings over food.”
“An army marches on its stomach,” von Stroheim declares definitively and loudly, and the remark efficiently ends that line of thought.
Jojo's Bizarre Adventure/Buffy the Vampire Slayer AU
Chapter Summary: Fitz, Jojo, and Darling meet von Stroheim's partner.
Word Count: 1122
Rating: Gen
Note: HERE THERE PROBABLY BE BUFFY/JJBA SPOILERS.
“Hey, is this a scheduled group hug, or can anyone join?” a new voice asks, except—it’s not really new, is it? It sounds familiar, and given the coincidence from earlier he’s half certain he’s right here, too, but he doesn’t need to confirm that right now.
Stroheim reaches out and pulls both the newcomer and a protesting Fitz in, of which Johan definitely approves. Fitz, being a Brit, probably hasn’t gotten enough hugs in his life, and Darling, well. She needs all the hugs she can get, because she’s probably deprived, and everyone needs more hugs.
“It was scheduled, but…” and Johan pauses for effect, staring down at his hand like he’s holding a page of paper and is the bouncer at some club or something, “…would you look at that, it looks like you’re on the list of invitees. You’re good.”
The newcomer grins and glances at von Stroheim. “I like this guy. Can we keep him?”
“He’s offered. I don’t see why not,” the blonde points out.
Fitz definitely growls. “Because you can’t own a human being.”
Xander places a calming, warning hand on his friend’s shoulder. “I think someone needs to tell you about metaphors and other literary…things.”
Green eyes turn to him, scandalized, and the Brit repeats incredulously, “Things?”
Johan shrugs, a smile playing around behind the serious expression. “I only learned a lot of things secondhand from Will.” He lets Speedwagon fume for a bit, directs the anger toward himself, and then speaks again. “I’m sorry I didn’t warn you, Fitz, but I’ve been fighting for a long time. We didn’t have a lot of time to react.” He casually leans against the nearby wall. For whatever reason, it’s as easy to put one of his feet in a yoga-like pose as he’d failed miserably at yoga in years past, but it doesn’t really matter right now and he doesn’t really care. “Besides, if I’d been wrong, LJ and Whisper would’ve been necessary. You were my backup plan.”
Stroheim nods approvingly, probably at the strategy involved, while Fitz doesn’t seem entirely appeased. Yet.
“How the hell do you just…just risk your life on a feeling?” the blond snarls eventually, hands balled into fists.
“I’ve risked my life on less,” he answers easily, and then realizes by the fierce flash in his friend’s eyes that’s the wrong response. “I managed to survive this long.”
“I have no clue how,” Fitz mutters, clinging to his anger jealously.
Xander just puts a friendly hand on his shoulder. “I’ve been lucky. I have the survival instincts of a Sunnydale native. But most importantly—I’m not alone. I have my friends and allies who’ve got my back.”
“Damn it, Jojo,” the blond mutters, burying his head in his hands.
“If you’re in the middle of a panic attack, we’re at our destination, so you can at least sit,” von Stroheim’s partner points out helpfully, pulling out a chair, into which Speedwagon sinks, barely aware. He frowns. “Wait—Jojo—”
“The name you’ll probably recognize is Johan Joestar, yes. You wouldn’t happen to be related to a mayor of New York City, would you?” He’s grinning, because he half knows the answer already.
“Damn,” and he’s grinning. “Non-hostile #2, huh? You sure know how to pick ‘em, Cap. Robin Brown, nicknamed ‘Hood’ because my partner,” he nudges her, and she barely moves, “…has a weird sense of humor.”
“And, likely, it has something to do with that bow you’ve got dismantled at your back,” Fitz joins in, and Xander blinks and immediately glances at Robin. How had he missed that? Buffy would be jealous. She’d want a nice, stylish bag to carry all her weapons, too.
“Yeah, it does. Welcome back to the world of the unpanicking,” he chuckles. “I use hamon and a bow. It wouldn’t work half as well without natural oil.”
“Have you run that by the Major?” Johan responds automatically, and waves it off when he just gets blank stares. “It’s a reference, don’t worry about it. That’s pretty cool.”
“Captain Beefheart von Stroheim,” she introduces herself. “I am here by leave of the German government.”
Jojo narrows his eyes before realizing why. “Oh, yeah, isn’t Germany more aware of the supernatural than most nations on average? Since…the Grimm brothers, or something? And I vaguely remember something about taking up a Van Helsing style crusade to make up for the World Wars…”
He notices Fitz has completely lost his angry look, replaced by sheer impressed confusion.
Xander sighs. “I may have slightly misrepresented myself at your bookstore. I did read growing up, other than comic books, but most of that was, well. Not under protest, but not entirely voluntary, either. A means of survival. Your average Malleus malificarum? Well, actually, I wasn’t allowed to read that one, because I have this weird tendency to set things on fire or summon things or other nasty consequences when I read texts like that out loud, but books like that, history and specifics of the supernatural, I’ve read and practically memorized.”
Fitz flushes for some reason. Probably because he’s realizing he’s underestimated Johan again, not that Xander hadn’t enjoyed it. “What languages do you speak, Jojo?” He’s definitely a little bit in awe.
He laughs. “Speak? English, British, and…” He stops, then continues, slower, “Oddly enough, Japanese. And a little Italian, ‘cause of bisnonna Suzi Q and I don’t even want to count how many greats grandmother Lisa Lisa. Though she is pretty great.” He pauses, letting that sink in, because it’s still a little shocking, all this stuff he doesn’t realize he actually knows through Pretender. “But mostly, I don’t speak languages because bad things happen when I do.”
The blond raises an eyebrow, and he grins and waggles his in return and continues.
“Mostly, I read dead languages. Latin, Sumerian, Egyptian, Ancient Chinese, Aklo, Aratuscan, Primordial Sanskrit. A few things in other languages. I probably couldn’t be conversational with any of them if I wanted to, because I’m much less likely to know the word for ‘pizza’ than I am the words for ‘human sacrifice’.”
“Because any of the languages you listed are likely to have the word for ‘pizza’,” Fitz mutters.
“They don’t? Savages!” he reacts with shock, holding his hand over his heart, and that causes Darling to laugh.
A good sound. She probably hasn’t laughed enough in her life. Which he’ll fix as much as he can.
“I’m noticing a similarity between you and our newfound allies,” Speedwagon remarks, ignoring the last comment. “You seem to want to hold all your strategy meetings over food.”
“An army marches on its stomach,” von Stroheim declares definitively and loudly, and the remark efficiently ends that line of thought.
