Sorta Kidnapped?

Main Points:
Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Assassin's Creed (The Meddling Gene)
Summary: Buffy finally manages to get in touch with Xander.  She isn't very happy.  The Assassins are a little wary, too, but they'd rather have more information on him one way or the other.
Word Count: 290
Rating: Teen

         “Xander, are you kidnapped or aren’t you?” Buffy growls, and he laughs even as he shifts in the seat, awkward.
         “Yesn’t?” he offers weakly. “They were worried about Evil Corp tracking them down, and they’ve been very nice about it. They’re practically running a Bed & Breakfast out here.”
         She sighs, and he can guess the kind of migraine he’s giving her, but this, all of this? It’s important.
         “Look, seriously, I was for real kidnapped to start with, and Buff, they’re pretty much the Initiative 2.0, lab coats and attitudes and all. They’re working with Wolfram & Hart, and I thought they’d known about, y’know, Ancients and Giles’ whole spiel before, so I let it slip, and they absolutely hadn’t known before now. The countdown to possible apocalypsis and another Adam has begun.”
         He doesn’t even have to glance at Rebecca or Shaun to know they’re looking at each other and making extensive notes for purposes of later searching. Given that Sunnydale had a paranoid habit of physical records, which were then subsequently destroyed by not-so-natural disaster, he wishes them good luck.
         The even longer silence is deafening. And then Buffy speaks. “Xander, did you just hand me an evil conspiracy to stab? It’s not even my birthday.”
         He winces. Sounds like her love life is...well, on par with all of theirs, still. Maybe they really had jinxed themselves years ago. That, or she’d been really worried, but by this point they should probably expect this. He can’t stay out of trouble, and she’s got better things to worry about. “Nah, but maybe an early Christmas present—and what with my paranoid B&B, I don’t know that I’ll actually be able to go out and get you anything else.”