Painful Priorities

Previously: Arrangements, All-American Hero, and Break It All (Build Something New)
also, johnny and xander are the kings of self-loathing, helped by their fathers

Main Points:
Buffy the Vampire Slayer (Oracle!Xan)
Summary: Xander decides to warn her instead. It changes nothing.
Word Count: 175
Rating: Teen
Warnings: Slight ableism due to the fact that Angelus already permanently disabled Xander previously.

        “Promise me you won’t hesitate.” Buffy still won’t meet his eyes. “I’m serious, Buff. I don’t want you to end up like Miss Calendar or me. Or Jesse.” It probably won’t do much, and he hates asking this of her. He trusts her to do the right thing, to stop the monster her boyfriend has become if she has to, but she’s still not a monster herself. She’ll probably hesitate, because that’s, y’know, what shows you’re human, with a conscience, and he absolutely hates that that literally is a weakness right now, in terms of strict reaction time.
        “I’ll try not to need the cavalry,” is what she responds instead. Because we both know you can’t come rolling to the rescue with CPR this time, she doesn’t say out loud, and it hurts even unspoken. It’s a realistic promise. He can’t decide if he likes it, because it means she really will probably be trying, or hates that she can’t lie to him any better than he can lie to himself in his own head.