Star Trek: Beyond (First Watch)

Pleasebegoodpleasebegoodpleasebegood

At least the soundtrack stays awesome

He’s actually trying to be a diplomat!!!

(okay, less than successfully…seriously, competent!jim is awesome)

Also that alien race?  Completely believable, how much time did they spend on cgi/makeup???

You had no idea of the size because of perspective awesome

“Jim, you look like crap” “Is that your professional medical opinion, Doctor?”

I JUST SAID THEY NEEDED A CAPTAIN’S LOG AND THERE YOU GO

Three years?

That would be a personal log

COOOOFFEEE

Scotty drinks tea in little dainty teacups!!!

Shore leave!  Shore leave!

Is that another orion??

Episodic?  Is that a wink?

That’s no reason not to try.

THAT WARP THOUGH THAT IS BEAUTIFUL

Which is why I have it

Awwww this there is more character study

AND WINONA EXISTS

And bones is existing in a more important—seriously, the small character moments mean so muchhhh

Labeling you as Mr Sensitive from now on, Bones.

Ohh man that is beautiful.

And, importantly, not San Francisco.

Transportation booth, more aliens…that’s the future.

Please keep it in other words.

There’s Bones being a jerk.

Aaawww sulu and his kid and kirk just smiles proudly like “one of my crew members is happy yay” it’s a little sad but it’s mostly in the eyes not the smile.

Aaaawww nimoy ☹

This already feels like it’s treating the subject matter with the respect it deserved.

(I should go to sleep)

IS THAT MATT PARKMAN

That’s an alien in distress

Is that a fellow captain that’s an older female and Kirk just nods at her respectfully

And he’s just using tech offhandedly like the genius we know he is

(he wouldn’t want to leave generally though)

There’s still a little awkwardness but they’re dealing with each other better

And more female crewmembers?

IS IT THAT ‘NO SUCH THING AS THE UNKNOWN QUOTE’ now I need to know if it’s exactly the same

Also more shirt rippage, bit belated, but.

Awwwww Chekov you small thing that needs to be protected.

Bigger doesn’t mean better (nacelles—power)

This is tense tense is important it’s so much cooler

(the firing before you’re supposed to is a kirk thing)

So evasives.  Hide behind a moon, something.

(small unremarked on moments are important they show us this is just normal)

Bones to go help heal.

Scotty, managing the impossible since forever.

Why though

And bones is getting more screentime

Keenser is more than just the comic relief

(is star trek still on the ‘even is good’ thing???)

Oh man tech is beautiful

I’m surprised he didn’t argue

I get strangled soooo much you have no idea (realistic portrayal?)

Why is the enterprise always getting destroyed?

Not quite

Chekov trying not to cry

He knows his crewmembers by name and isn’t just like ‘random female crewman’ where were you Kirk?

And fighting by thinking

*laughs* Scotty remote-controlling a ship.

UHURA GETTING TO ACTUALLY DO SOMETHING AND BE AWESOME

And her uniform now shows rank!!!

And she just looks ticked off.

Indian lady 😊

I love how they didn’t immediately accuse her or try to interrogate her or anything it’s just ‘we’ve got bigger priorities rn’

And they acted to protect her despite the fact that she was probably involved because life is important

shut uP SHE IS A BEAUTIFUL LADY AND WE LOVE HER

I’d say that would be out of character.

But his ship was just destroyed, some of his crew members were killed and a lot captured, of course he would react like that

Also the thing that gets him to lower his weapon is the lady saying she was protecting her crew and the realization “she could be me” beautiful

Okay I should really go to sleep now

Also baby Chekov :(

That’s pretty and alien

There’s a lot of people being herded in places therES A FEMALE WEARING PANTS YESSSSS I would never wear a dress or skirt.  Just saying. Or a kilt.  (I have a feeling even genderbent I'd feel too exposed to skirt I mean I hate wearing shorts)

(I like the alien subtitles too)

Nyota being awesome and just kind of ticked off that she was taken captive.

BOOOONES bones be medic and get more screentime pls

That’s why I’m gonna be awesome and save your hide.

Good point on that, although I feel it has relevance to racism/xenophobia as well

BEING AWESOME

Goodbye communicator

Muda?  As in, useless?

HTAT IS COOOL

Scotty attempting to be angry too

She is awesome.  (too bad carol couldn’t be) that’s what, three female characters that have been more awesome than anything we’ve seen thus far, plus awesome normal character moments

The look of heartbreak on kirk’s face seeing the Enterprise down.

Spock’s just like *glance* do you really think everything’s going to kill us doctor?

Spock’s also more Vulcan than previously

USS Franklin.  I…don’t know the history of that ship sadly

The way those guys move is very…I don’t know.  I want to say Dead Space but I don’t think that’s right.

Then again my heart’s breaking right now.

He’s a genius, you know

Ooh, Keenser even being awesome

Magellan probe?  …that sounds…that sounds like I should know it.

DOOOOOM? Mebbe?  IDK

The crew is all geniuses.

Maybe you shouldn’t have trusted her.

Ohhhhhh! See, outsmarting her.  That’s how you do it, Kirk.

That’s creepy.  And almost always a bad idea.  Like, whenever they say that, it’s not good.

He knows every bit of this ship like the back of his hand.

Now, that?  that he wouldn’t have messed up.  Mr. I could probably put back together every single console on my ship

Interesting female villain(?) too? Niiice

Okayyy, dead female villain.  Still.  She was interesting.

And see, this?  Also looks alien.

WE’VE BEEN MISSING ALIENS IN THIS SCIENCE FICTION FRANCHISE SO LONG OMG

We’ve also got the captain who sacrificed his life to save his ship.  We know sacrifice.

SULU’S AWESOME

Strength in unity!! :)

Jerk is literally killing diversity.  That’s…that’s a thing.

They’re having an actual conversation and WE’VE BEEN MISSING CONVERSATIONS AS WELL

Please have an actual good ending I want to love this movie sooo much

And Spock knows he’s lying.

Usually by running into it but you know

…I.  I recognize that music actually.

That would be Kirk managing to have issues.  Probably.

Problem.  Fix with rock?

“handsome bastard”

Saving you, you know.

Just being professional this is amazing

(that

SORRY I HAD TO PAUSE TO FLAIL

SCOTTY IS GOING ON ABOUT THE HISTORY

AND KIRK GOES ‘I REMEMBER THAT FROM THE ACADEMY’ AND REMEMBERS THE DETAILS AND THE LOOK OF AWE ON HIS FACE AS HE LOOKS AROUND AND SEES HEY THIS IS HISTORY I AM STANDING IN HISTORY

I

ICANNOT

…uh, I entirely forgot what I was saying before, but that might be because I just had to restar t my brain

Ugh

I wish I’d known about this movie sooner (literally, I had no idea it even came out last year.  Dunno if I would’ve been interested after the mess that was Into Darkness, but seriously.)

Then again, maybe things (even online calc) happened for a reason

Because I went and saw Wrath of Khan and jumpstarted my interest in Star Trek and got wrapped up in TOS as opposed to being a casual fan

So I can just flail over this

(giant green space hand??? :D heheheh)

I guess you can have the Captain’s chair, yes

(how was the script more Star Trek before this?  How did it have to be less ‘trekked’?  I’m seriously curious about the answer)

Pats it like *already nostalgic, want to be Captain*

this is Kirk.  I want to hug him.  This is.

The movie is halfway over and already I cannot.

CLOAKING

Kirk just blinks, but seriously, he should be used to this by now.  Scotty’s the insane “I can push everything just a little farther” guy

Also can I say I like the new communicators

“Shut up we’re saving you” “Yes, Captain McCoy”

They’re friends.  They got to friends.

*starts laughing out loud at Spock getting transported out after*…you know, Bones, the universe hates you.  Presumably because you hate it back.

Great, I have to use ancient tech.

Better than the twentieth century.

Wait he’s watching Kirk’s captain’s logs.  I’m pretty sure the fragment of the first one is actually from the previous years, since it didn’t sound familiar.  I’d love to know what it said.

Nnoooo syl :( (I mean, interesting character, but nooo)

There’s an Indian lady, someone who looks almost like the Thing…maaan.

You’ll say that until our unity kicks your alien butt.

Speaking with eyebrow.

Transporters sometimes not working is pretty common.

Also the triumvirate

It wouldn’t be the first time we’ve accomplished the impossible.

And can I say how awesome it is that the bike skills are being used?  LIke, you give a character skills, and sometimes they show up on screen, and sometimes they’re used again, later, because you set it up.  That’s doing it right

Why are you picking on the females Kraal?

She’s good at reading intricacies of speech

Nooo

Why are you showing off to her?

Hey uhura.

This is actually really clever, not just action for action.

Also SNIPER man!

Uhura saves the day!

You know.  Obvious.

They look kinda similar to Klingons but I don’t know if that’s what they’re going for

No, we made a promise.  Crew.

That almost grin :)

Not taking off from ground, that’s a direct reference too.

SEATBELTS

Welcome to the crazy crew of the Enterprise

See, this is science fiction done right.  Explain things, follow up on things.

If anything we can make this all through sheer willpower ‘cause that’s how we roll

UHURA TRANSLATING SPOCK that is adorable

Also this is kirk you think he’s gonna risk someone else?

This is as ridiculous as whales and yet it is perfect.

Just.  Kirk’s hands as he grabs on to the arms of the chair

It’s classical by this point.

Whoops we messed up

That’s pretty

Yorktown is pretty

Whoops

See colonies are important too

The architecture of this place though

There’s that imagination.  Why Earth when you could beautiful colony?

Yo Starfleet

Well, you could always try water.

There’s a dead red shirt.

Uhura, don’t wander off.

Or do.

Language lady.

Ohhhboy

“We’re not a military agency” you understand this so well scotty

Never meet your heroes.  They all turn out to be freaking nutbags.

I keep forgetting Kirk’s in blue

How often do you get choked seriously

You say ‘can’t’ I say ‘you don’t have enough imagination’

Were you going to help or…last minute he changed his mind it looks like

Thanks scotty bones for the ride

STOP THANKING SPOCK IT’S NOT JUST SPOCK BONES HELPED TOO

Who—wait.

Wwww-waitwaitwaitwhat

SHE’S THE LADY FROM THE EXPANSE.  THE AMBASSADOR LADY THAT’S WHY I KNOW HER

This

I still can’t

I am going to hug all of you to pieces that is it

Hope is just as necessary for life as food.

And now you’re going to make me cry whyyyy you do this

Yeah, doesn’t it sound like fun? (snorts, two seconds early)

I LOVE YOUR SHIRT

KIRK KNOWS AND IS JUST GIVING HIM AN OUT

Of course

She is a beautiful lady and we love her so, so much

This is beautiful

I can’t

Oh they made it better o okay I  am crying I cannot handle that was beautiful let me just

Amazon list this now

And apologize for ever having doubted

Okay, letter to JJAbrams now.  You finally got to a 100% beautiful thing.

DO NOT MESS THIS UP NOW.

(continue to give everyone awesome parts.  Continue to have better writing.  Continue to focus on more than just spock.  for goodness sake give bones more to do.  Give us hope.  Give us Star Trek.

And make me cry.)