Deconstruction
Mar. 9th, 2017 09:50 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
madimpossibledreamerI have a lot of feelings about this episode, okay? Because 90% of the people blame Xander for it. They just seem to see it as Xander not manning up, but they ignore the whole vision thing. It might have been a little while since I've seen it, but I seem to remember that the episode wasn't even declarative on whether or not that vision was fake or not (and even if it was fake, it was a very real possibility at least to Xander!)
Xander saw himself become his father. An abusive, drunken bastard, broken and hurting and hurting everyone else, too. So he made the decision to prevent that future, even if it kills him, even if it hurts Anya, because it will protect her in the long run.
Xander, like Tony, will sacrifice himself, because, let's get real, despite anything he might say he doesn't see himself as being worthwhile or worth anything. Probably due to his family. But there's some of Cap's old-fashioned heroism in there, too. He can't watch people suffer, can't just stand on the sidelines. (Then again, realistic!MCU!soldier-with-PTSD Cap also has self-esteem issues. For both Tony and Steve it boils down to: I am a soldier, I am a weapon, better me than them, they deserve to live, and, under their breath, I don't.)
Xander's desire to protect the ones he loves at any cost just gets magnified when coupled with the issues of several different Tony Starks, and as many things in their lives it goes boom.
~Dreamer~
Main Points:
Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Iron Man Crossover (Self-Made Hero)
Summary: Xander Harris's wedding day didn't go well. Xander Jesse Knight's was worse.
Word Count: 755
Rating: Teen, ANGST
Note: contains alcohol abuse that is likely to get worse in the next chapter. This one's not light, people.
At first, Anya’s upset. First of all, she’s an ex-vengeance demon. She has half a mind to go back and see if D’Hoffryn will accept her again just so that she can punish Xander. (Maybe that’s why she sleeps with Spike, because he understands and is good at sex and doesn’t treat her like she’s a nobody. Not like Xander does, most of the time, but what he did was inexcusable and she doesn’t understand. It’s the not understanding that gets her the most, she thinks.)
She purses her lips, but then uses the key and barges in. If Xander didn’t want her here, he could use his sexy power armor or something. She needs her things, anyway.
She stares at the warehouse, breathing in. At first she’d been upset, since it wasn’t what she’d pictured as being super romantic, but then, Xander had the memories of Tony Stark, so he was good at sex, too. And he had money, and he made their nice little roost at the top of the warehouse as comfortable as she would’ve liked, even if she would’ve preferred a nice apartment. She would, surprisingly enough, miss this place. And him. But she also has standards.
She casts the spell for the magical elevator and when she gets to the top she sees something she never expected. Which is hard, really. If you’re a vengeance demon for a thousand years, you see a lot.
Xander’s sitting there. He’s in his armor, minus the helmet, but unlike every single other time he suits up he looks smaller, hunched, like he’s trying to curl up and hide from the world. And he is clearly drunk. He’s surrounded by bottles.
Which is a surprise, considering he dislikes alcohol and avoids it at all costs. He hadn’t even wanted champagne at the wedding. She’d tried to get a straight answer from him about why, but had failed.
He glances up and he’s to the point he’s probably in danger of alcohol poisoning by this point, considering how slow he reacts. “You’re not…real,” he slurs, pointing at her vaguely with the bottle and sloshing a little of it on his armor. He doesn’t even seem to notice.
“Xander. What is wrong with you.” She crouches down and pulls the bottle from his hands. She actually has to try hard. He seems to be clutching on to it like it’s a lifeline. There’s a lost, despairing look in his eyes that she’s never seen, even in the men she’s punished over the years.
“What isn’t?” She’s alarmed to see there’s tears. Not that her ex doesn’t cry, ever, but he doesn’t cry this much.
Anya sighs. Maybe there was actually a reason he hadn’t shown up. “Pumpkin. Please talk to me.”
“Talk about what? About my problems? About how I’m a shit human being?” There’s anger and pain in his voice.
Anya frowns and tosses the bottle over the side. It smashes on the warehouse floor. He whimpers and curls in on himself.
“Xander, I’ve never seen you like this before. I don’t think you’re a loser and you never have been. That being said, you’re acting like an absolute idiot and I’m absolutely not sure why.” She bites her lip. “I love you and I will probably never stop, but I cannot deal with this. I’m not going to leave you like this, though.” She takes out her cell phone. “I’m keeping this, by the way. Even if you expect it back you are not getting it back. I deserve nice things like this.” She calls Willow. “You’re probably angry with Xander and that’s perfectly acceptable. I am also furious. But there’s something clearly wrong with him and I don’t feel like dealing with it but I am worried about him.”
Willow is concerned, but not for Xander. Which is a problem. “Honestly, I’ll be fine. Xander is nice, but he’s hardly the only man on Earth who can give me good orgasms. Given how I found him I’m fairly sure he actually will hurt himself worse than anything I can do, and I’m definitely worried about him. Please make sure he does not die. I’ll wait until you show up and then I will go elsewhere.”
She’s true to her word, and when Willow shows up her ‘men are evil’ attitude quickly changes when she sees exactly how upset he is, to the point he’s almost falling into a coma, and she’s just as aghast.
How can you be mad at someone so pathetic?
Xander saw himself become his father. An abusive, drunken bastard, broken and hurting and hurting everyone else, too. So he made the decision to prevent that future, even if it kills him, even if it hurts Anya, because it will protect her in the long run.
Xander, like Tony, will sacrifice himself, because, let's get real, despite anything he might say he doesn't see himself as being worthwhile or worth anything. Probably due to his family. But there's some of Cap's old-fashioned heroism in there, too. He can't watch people suffer, can't just stand on the sidelines. (Then again, realistic!MCU!soldier-with-PTSD Cap also has self-esteem issues. For both Tony and Steve it boils down to: I am a soldier, I am a weapon, better me than them, they deserve to live, and, under their breath, I don't.)
Xander's desire to protect the ones he loves at any cost just gets magnified when coupled with the issues of several different Tony Starks, and as many things in their lives it goes boom.
~Dreamer~
Main Points:
Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Iron Man Crossover (Self-Made Hero)
Summary: Xander Harris's wedding day didn't go well. Xander Jesse Knight's was worse.
Word Count: 755
Rating: Teen, ANGST
Note: contains alcohol abuse that is likely to get worse in the next chapter. This one's not light, people.
At first, Anya’s upset. First of all, she’s an ex-vengeance demon. She has half a mind to go back and see if D’Hoffryn will accept her again just so that she can punish Xander. (Maybe that’s why she sleeps with Spike, because he understands and is good at sex and doesn’t treat her like she’s a nobody. Not like Xander does, most of the time, but what he did was inexcusable and she doesn’t understand. It’s the not understanding that gets her the most, she thinks.)
She purses her lips, but then uses the key and barges in. If Xander didn’t want her here, he could use his sexy power armor or something. She needs her things, anyway.
She stares at the warehouse, breathing in. At first she’d been upset, since it wasn’t what she’d pictured as being super romantic, but then, Xander had the memories of Tony Stark, so he was good at sex, too. And he had money, and he made their nice little roost at the top of the warehouse as comfortable as she would’ve liked, even if she would’ve preferred a nice apartment. She would, surprisingly enough, miss this place. And him. But she also has standards.
She casts the spell for the magical elevator and when she gets to the top she sees something she never expected. Which is hard, really. If you’re a vengeance demon for a thousand years, you see a lot.
Xander’s sitting there. He’s in his armor, minus the helmet, but unlike every single other time he suits up he looks smaller, hunched, like he’s trying to curl up and hide from the world. And he is clearly drunk. He’s surrounded by bottles.
Which is a surprise, considering he dislikes alcohol and avoids it at all costs. He hadn’t even wanted champagne at the wedding. She’d tried to get a straight answer from him about why, but had failed.
He glances up and he’s to the point he’s probably in danger of alcohol poisoning by this point, considering how slow he reacts. “You’re not…real,” he slurs, pointing at her vaguely with the bottle and sloshing a little of it on his armor. He doesn’t even seem to notice.
“Xander. What is wrong with you.” She crouches down and pulls the bottle from his hands. She actually has to try hard. He seems to be clutching on to it like it’s a lifeline. There’s a lost, despairing look in his eyes that she’s never seen, even in the men she’s punished over the years.
“What isn’t?” She’s alarmed to see there’s tears. Not that her ex doesn’t cry, ever, but he doesn’t cry this much.
Anya sighs. Maybe there was actually a reason he hadn’t shown up. “Pumpkin. Please talk to me.”
“Talk about what? About my problems? About how I’m a shit human being?” There’s anger and pain in his voice.
Anya frowns and tosses the bottle over the side. It smashes on the warehouse floor. He whimpers and curls in on himself.
“Xander, I’ve never seen you like this before. I don’t think you’re a loser and you never have been. That being said, you’re acting like an absolute idiot and I’m absolutely not sure why.” She bites her lip. “I love you and I will probably never stop, but I cannot deal with this. I’m not going to leave you like this, though.” She takes out her cell phone. “I’m keeping this, by the way. Even if you expect it back you are not getting it back. I deserve nice things like this.” She calls Willow. “You’re probably angry with Xander and that’s perfectly acceptable. I am also furious. But there’s something clearly wrong with him and I don’t feel like dealing with it but I am worried about him.”
Willow is concerned, but not for Xander. Which is a problem. “Honestly, I’ll be fine. Xander is nice, but he’s hardly the only man on Earth who can give me good orgasms. Given how I found him I’m fairly sure he actually will hurt himself worse than anything I can do, and I’m definitely worried about him. Please make sure he does not die. I’ll wait until you show up and then I will go elsewhere.”
She’s true to her word, and when Willow shows up her ‘men are evil’ attitude quickly changes when she sees exactly how upset he is, to the point he’s almost falling into a coma, and she’s just as aghast.
How can you be mad at someone so pathetic?
