She was not on board with that plan and took over much like Pepper from the Armored Adventures. (She's great. You'll be seeing a lot more of her. Looking forward to that muchly.) Much more light-hearted following the previous postings.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Iron Man Crossover (Self-Made Hero)
Summary: Spike's just looking out for Xander, and if that means pretending that he's working for the kid, that's what he'll do.
Word Count: 485
“I found you a bloody Watcher,” Spike says, and Xander sighs and sets down the soldering iron.
“Hello to you too. Also, I don’t know if you got the memo; I happen to be a Watcher myself. Then again, you don’t have an office or a desk, so maybe you didn’t get it.”
“Is it the bureaucracy that makes the lot of you raving idiots?” Spike asks. It’s a rhetorical question. “Though all things considered, I think you’re still more stable than Droopy.”
“Is that what we’re calling Angel this week?” He perks up a little. Buffy still gets mad, but she doesn’t get that this is his way of connecting with Angel without losing it. Seriously, Angel has seen way too much that should be strictly confidential and if they actually are civil there may be tears, and that’s not of the good. “See? Memos? Good.”
There’s a snort in the background. Xander guesses it’s probably Spike trying to contain his amusement. “By watcher, I meant more a babysitter. Keep you from blowing yourself up. The Little Bit wouldn’t like it.”
He blinks and then goes back to his workstation, fingers flying over the keys. At least he can do something. Be productive somehow. “Hey, I don’t blow things up that much, and last I checked I wasn’t under the age of, say, seventeen? Is that the cutoff point for babysitters?”
“I’d like to see you try to convince her that you’re an adult,” the vampire says, with bite. Which, yeah, maybe he was seeing how far Spike’s patience went. Still. “She said in the interview that she can deal with the odd, so you should hire her.”
He pauses what he’s doing and hacks into the Knight Innovations private (read: vampire-safe) jet to read the resumé submitted, and snorts into his cup of tea (earl grey, strong, he needed the caffeine and ran out of the good coffee a couple of days ago and forgot to replace it). “She lied.” It’s not even the way it’s phrased. He’s gotten better about reading tech, and she’d written this on her personal computer.
“Fine, she’s Cordy’s cousin,” Spike responded, and for a moment the world stops and all Xander can hear is his heartbeat, unnaturally loud, in his ears.
“Uh, yeah, okay, that’ll do it,” he manages, voice hoarse, and clears his throat. “Any other Chases I should know about?” The idea that he’d take care of them somehow is a given. Scoobies take care of their own. As well as they’re capable, given that they’re, well, them and completely capable of fights over the stupidest things.
“The dad’s a wanker, the other cousin Timmy’s happily employed, and the rest are dead, so no,” Spike says honestly, and Xander sits back and lets out a bark of laughter.
“It’s a pleasure to hear from you as always,” Xander murmurs and then shuts off the communication.