Locked Inside Me
Mar. 5th, 2023 02:07 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
madimpossibledreamerseries title has been decided & is due to parallels to a certain other storyline (well, and okarin, and jotaro, but options for naming there are more limited). I'll talk about it in a future post in the series.
I actually really like and wasn't expecting the parallels here between these characters that seemingly have no connection to each other. Yukiko might have a crush because he's a seemingly cool, collected guy from the Big City, but even after that calms down I think she'd like hanging around him as an adult because here's an adult who understands her due to those similarities and doesn't expect anything from her.
Main Points:
Persona 2/Persona 4 crossover (Broken Hero)
Chapter Summary: Yukiko is intrigued by a newcomer, and Tatsuya is just done with everything.
Word Count: 1803
Rating: gen
Pairing: hinted Tatsuya/Jun (but it's Tatsuya so he's not too obvious about the longing), Yukiko has a one-sided crush on Tatsuya (as per her story)
Warning: Tatsuya has depression (as you might expect if you've seen Eternal Punishment at all), so no shame if you wait until you're in a good headspace for this & seek help if you need it! I might not know you personally but I still care.
It’s only spring, and aside from a little rain, it’s generally been warm, but the warmth never seems to enter Tatsuya’s skin. A frozen world might seem far away, removed from the small town, but that unnatural feeling only fuels its power. The world was never meant to be trapped like this, unchanging. Just like with the rumors, its artificial nature keeps it from fading to the back of the mind, and it’s fueled by the power of thought.
It’s always strange being away from Sumaru. The feeling lessens, but it feels even more like he doesn’t belong. Take all the respect he’d gotten for his position as an out-of-town police officer. It was natural when directed at Katsuya, but it’s hard to accept when directed at him. Then again, he’d never quite understood all the talk about him being a cool guy, either. He’s learned to merely smile and nod at praise but it never feels genuine. If they really knew him, they wouldn’t be saying such things. They’d just give up, like Eikichi, Lisa, Maya, even Yukino—and why not? He’s not particularly worth anyone’s effort to stay in touch, because he’s too distant, too difficult. Only Anna bothers, and that’s because she doesn’t particularly care if he doesn’t respond. Even Jun was only being polite; he’d taken off the second he could to go see what remained of the shopping district and possibly to get a kimono once they’d finished settling in at the inn, rather than remain at Tatsuya’s side. He talked about the need for a kimono for a traditional Japanese inn, but while he had nice ones at home, he didn’t have any nice enough. He’d probably been slightly encouraging Tatsuya to go, too, only the officer had gone and fallen asleep and the other man was gone by the time he woke up. Then again, why should he have expected any differently?
“Excuse me. Are you finding everything to your liking so far, sir?” He’s not in the mood to talk, but then, he rarely ever is.
He grunts, trying to make himself sound as reassuring as he can, but apparently it doesn’t work, because she walks into sight. It’s the…daughter of the manager, he thinks. Wearing a kimono. “I’m sorry; is there anything we can do better?”
He shrugs awkwardly; it’s not like he really had any true expectations, or even wanted much. He had somewhere he could sleep and they served food. “It’s fine.” It’s clear she doesn’t believe him, so he adds, “I don’t say things just to be polite.”
She smiles, hesitant, but it’s clear she’s begun to relax a little, which is something. “Sorry. We’re all on edge due to this Yamano-san business.” It takes him a moment to realize he’d misheard; for a moment he’d thought she’d said Amano, but of course not. Maya is far from all of this tragedy.
He nods, and then, guessing he needs to actually put effort into speaking, resigns himself to the headache he’ll have later. “I’m sure it hasn’t been easy. I’m not going to complain.”
She kneels next to him, facing out at the rain. “They keep asking about her. As if we know all that much. At least you’re not just here looking to satisfy your own curiosity, Officer.” No doubt she’d been happy to deny further gossips rooms thanks to the Shadow Operatives’ reservations. “Though I understand if you have questions to ask.”
Honestly, he’s half expecting to walk through the town and feel a Persona resonance that’ll point him in the right direction. Though Personas are rare, a fact that never ceases to surprise and amaze him, and where there’s one, there tends to be more, so it won’t in truth tell him much, particularly if it’s in a crowded area. He’s always been able to sense killing intent, but even that might not get you far. It would, probably, require a Persona or some other type of power to have gotten her up on the telephone pole—the first thing the local police had done was look for things like power lifts missing from the area, to no success—and none were missing, reported missing, or spotted anywhere near the area at the time of the incident.
If he could, he’d call his brother and ask for advice. Katsuya clearly knows much more about how to be a police officer than he does, and the action would definitely make him happy. The problem is, as it always is when it comes to his brother, is that Katsuya would spend the next three hours questioning Tatsuya’s motives, time he shouldn’t be wasting.
So he just has to do this on his own—with Jun, if his friend actually feels like being involved. He knows the local police have already probably asked all of the usual questions—when was she seen last, whether there was any possibility the man she’d been having an affair with or the jilted wife were seen recently.
He decides to take a shot in the dark. “Were there any weird rumors about her?”
The surprise on the girl’s face says he’s not what she expected—which is only to be suspected, really. “No, I don’t think so…” They sit in silence, watching the rain fall, and Tatsuya takes another sip of the tea, which honestly is a little lukewarm at this point. He’s not going to complain, though.
“The big city really is different, isn’t it?” she asks, like she’s never been, and—well, that’s actually a vaguely horrifying thought. He’d lived most of his life in Sumaru City, never venturing outside, sure, but that was an actual city with districts and everything. True, advantages to country living exist, he’s sure, but he prefers the indifference of the city to the nosiness of the countryside. Plus, from what he’s seen, they look down on motorcycles. He’d heard one of the maids complaining about a motorcycle gang. Other than the lighter, he doesn’t really have all that much else he cares about in terms of possessions. The thought he’d have to give that up, that people would be putting themselves at risk by bothering him so much…well, he’s grateful for an empty apartment he barely sees and a parking space for his bike.
“It can be.” From her frown, she finds the answer deeply unsatisfying, which is only to be expected—it’s the usual outcome of a conversation with him, after all, excluding, perhaps, demon contacts. She rearranges herself to face him more, and—oh, no. Sure, she’s attractive for a teenager, but she’s a literal teenager, and no matter how unsatisfying she finds her life, throwing herself at strange men traveling through will only make her situation worse. At least she doesn’t look like she knows what she’s doing, or he’d be more concerned.
He simply won’t respond. Not that the strategy worked for Lisa, but surely it’ll work on someone. They can’t all be that persistent. “You can always read about it. Or visit, with friends.”
She doesn’t look as reassured by that as he’d want, but words aren’t his strength, and he has no idea what he should be saying. “If they’re good friends, they’ll be supportive, if you explain it’s your dream.” If he ever still had any clue of what he wanted to be, they would have been. Part of the reason they’d been so hard on him was that they sensed that he still had no idea what he wanted to be, though it’s hard to tell how much of that is the growing certainty he’ll never get to make his own choices, not as the living key protecting the world from destruction.
“But everyone expects—” She cuts herself off, frustrated—which, if she can’t even voice her deepest concerns with a stranger, she’s definitely not in a place where she can leave with one. It might not stop her entirely, but hopefully she realizes that truth, too.
“Some of them might just expect things because you haven’t told them clearly.” He thinks back about that teacher at St. Hermelin, the absolutely impressive speech he’d given. There’s no way Tatsuya can match that. “Of course, I’m one to talk about actually talking to people, but—people can’t read your mind. If you don’t say anything, they might think you’re okay with the way things are, or even that you just don’t care.” He smirks, absent-mindedly playing with the lighter to gather his thoughts. “For the people who want the best for you, do your best to communicate, and as for the rest…screw them.”
She blinks, staring at her hands, and then smiles brilliantly. “I suppose I’ll start with you, Suou-san. You have no reason to care what I do with my life one way or the other, after all. I’m expected to inherit the inn, but it feels like a cage. I get to see strangers like you come and leave, and meanwhile all I get to do is stay here.”
He sees some of that restless desire to travel with the lack of a clear goal. It’s like staring into a mirror of ice.
“You have time to figure out what you’re doing. Talk it over with the people you trust.” It’s easy to say that you have to have everything figured out by senior year, but he suspects even for people who aren’t him, that’s not true—look at Mayuzumi-san, for one. She still wasn’t sure about her path, but she’d kept at it anyway. “If you need more advice, Jun—that is, Kashihara-san can be a lot more helpful. He’s good at listening.”
She smiles again, fleeting, the beauty of a snowflake doomed to melt, and tells him, “You’re a lot better at it than you think, yourself. Thank you for listening to the silly woes of a high-schooler, Suou-san.” She begins to get to her feet before shaking her head. “Well, I’m not sure if this has anything to do with your question, but I just remembered something. My friend Chie says there’s a rumor of the Midnight Channel. They say that if you stare into a switched off TV on a rainy night you’ll see your soulmate. Supposedly it works, she said, because someone saw Yamano-san. That’s the only thing I’ve heard.” She pats his shoulder and then leaves—but strangely, the frozen ice of the snowglobe doesn’t seem as harsh, anymore, despite the threat of more supernatural killings. It will return, he knows from experience, but perhaps talking to her wasn’t the wrong decision after all.
I actually really like and wasn't expecting the parallels here between these characters that seemingly have no connection to each other. Yukiko might have a crush because he's a seemingly cool, collected guy from the Big City, but even after that calms down I think she'd like hanging around him as an adult because here's an adult who understands her due to those similarities and doesn't expect anything from her.
Main Points:
Persona 2/Persona 4 crossover (Broken Hero)
Chapter Summary: Yukiko is intrigued by a newcomer, and Tatsuya is just done with everything.
Word Count: 1803
Rating: gen
Pairing: hinted Tatsuya/Jun (but it's Tatsuya so he's not too obvious about the longing), Yukiko has a one-sided crush on Tatsuya (as per her story)
Warning: Tatsuya has depression (as you might expect if you've seen Eternal Punishment at all), so no shame if you wait until you're in a good headspace for this & seek help if you need it! I might not know you personally but I still care.
The world, Tatsuya reflects, taking the tea offered by one of the maids, feels like a snowglobe, one of those antiques the Time Count had been selling. Only one little tap would be necessary to shatter everything.
It’s only spring, and aside from a little rain, it’s generally been warm, but the warmth never seems to enter Tatsuya’s skin. A frozen world might seem far away, removed from the small town, but that unnatural feeling only fuels its power. The world was never meant to be trapped like this, unchanging. Just like with the rumors, its artificial nature keeps it from fading to the back of the mind, and it’s fueled by the power of thought.
It’s always strange being away from Sumaru. The feeling lessens, but it feels even more like he doesn’t belong. Take all the respect he’d gotten for his position as an out-of-town police officer. It was natural when directed at Katsuya, but it’s hard to accept when directed at him. Then again, he’d never quite understood all the talk about him being a cool guy, either. He’s learned to merely smile and nod at praise but it never feels genuine. If they really knew him, they wouldn’t be saying such things. They’d just give up, like Eikichi, Lisa, Maya, even Yukino—and why not? He’s not particularly worth anyone’s effort to stay in touch, because he’s too distant, too difficult. Only Anna bothers, and that’s because she doesn’t particularly care if he doesn’t respond. Even Jun was only being polite; he’d taken off the second he could to go see what remained of the shopping district and possibly to get a kimono once they’d finished settling in at the inn, rather than remain at Tatsuya’s side. He talked about the need for a kimono for a traditional Japanese inn, but while he had nice ones at home, he didn’t have any nice enough. He’d probably been slightly encouraging Tatsuya to go, too, only the officer had gone and fallen asleep and the other man was gone by the time he woke up. Then again, why should he have expected any differently?
“Excuse me. Are you finding everything to your liking so far, sir?” He’s not in the mood to talk, but then, he rarely ever is.
He grunts, trying to make himself sound as reassuring as he can, but apparently it doesn’t work, because she walks into sight. It’s the…daughter of the manager, he thinks. Wearing a kimono. “I’m sorry; is there anything we can do better?”
He shrugs awkwardly; it’s not like he really had any true expectations, or even wanted much. He had somewhere he could sleep and they served food. “It’s fine.” It’s clear she doesn’t believe him, so he adds, “I don’t say things just to be polite.”
She smiles, hesitant, but it’s clear she’s begun to relax a little, which is something. “Sorry. We’re all on edge due to this Yamano-san business.” It takes him a moment to realize he’d misheard; for a moment he’d thought she’d said Amano, but of course not. Maya is far from all of this tragedy.
He nods, and then, guessing he needs to actually put effort into speaking, resigns himself to the headache he’ll have later. “I’m sure it hasn’t been easy. I’m not going to complain.”
She kneels next to him, facing out at the rain. “They keep asking about her. As if we know all that much. At least you’re not just here looking to satisfy your own curiosity, Officer.” No doubt she’d been happy to deny further gossips rooms thanks to the Shadow Operatives’ reservations. “Though I understand if you have questions to ask.”
Honestly, he’s half expecting to walk through the town and feel a Persona resonance that’ll point him in the right direction. Though Personas are rare, a fact that never ceases to surprise and amaze him, and where there’s one, there tends to be more, so it won’t in truth tell him much, particularly if it’s in a crowded area. He’s always been able to sense killing intent, but even that might not get you far. It would, probably, require a Persona or some other type of power to have gotten her up on the telephone pole—the first thing the local police had done was look for things like power lifts missing from the area, to no success—and none were missing, reported missing, or spotted anywhere near the area at the time of the incident.
If he could, he’d call his brother and ask for advice. Katsuya clearly knows much more about how to be a police officer than he does, and the action would definitely make him happy. The problem is, as it always is when it comes to his brother, is that Katsuya would spend the next three hours questioning Tatsuya’s motives, time he shouldn’t be wasting.
So he just has to do this on his own—with Jun, if his friend actually feels like being involved. He knows the local police have already probably asked all of the usual questions—when was she seen last, whether there was any possibility the man she’d been having an affair with or the jilted wife were seen recently.
He decides to take a shot in the dark. “Were there any weird rumors about her?”
The surprise on the girl’s face says he’s not what she expected—which is only to be suspected, really. “No, I don’t think so…” They sit in silence, watching the rain fall, and Tatsuya takes another sip of the tea, which honestly is a little lukewarm at this point. He’s not going to complain, though.
“The big city really is different, isn’t it?” she asks, like she’s never been, and—well, that’s actually a vaguely horrifying thought. He’d lived most of his life in Sumaru City, never venturing outside, sure, but that was an actual city with districts and everything. True, advantages to country living exist, he’s sure, but he prefers the indifference of the city to the nosiness of the countryside. Plus, from what he’s seen, they look down on motorcycles. He’d heard one of the maids complaining about a motorcycle gang. Other than the lighter, he doesn’t really have all that much else he cares about in terms of possessions. The thought he’d have to give that up, that people would be putting themselves at risk by bothering him so much…well, he’s grateful for an empty apartment he barely sees and a parking space for his bike.
“It can be.” From her frown, she finds the answer deeply unsatisfying, which is only to be expected—it’s the usual outcome of a conversation with him, after all, excluding, perhaps, demon contacts. She rearranges herself to face him more, and—oh, no. Sure, she’s attractive for a teenager, but she’s a literal teenager, and no matter how unsatisfying she finds her life, throwing herself at strange men traveling through will only make her situation worse. At least she doesn’t look like she knows what she’s doing, or he’d be more concerned.
He simply won’t respond. Not that the strategy worked for Lisa, but surely it’ll work on someone. They can’t all be that persistent. “You can always read about it. Or visit, with friends.”
She doesn’t look as reassured by that as he’d want, but words aren’t his strength, and he has no idea what he should be saying. “If they’re good friends, they’ll be supportive, if you explain it’s your dream.” If he ever still had any clue of what he wanted to be, they would have been. Part of the reason they’d been so hard on him was that they sensed that he still had no idea what he wanted to be, though it’s hard to tell how much of that is the growing certainty he’ll never get to make his own choices, not as the living key protecting the world from destruction.
“But everyone expects—” She cuts herself off, frustrated—which, if she can’t even voice her deepest concerns with a stranger, she’s definitely not in a place where she can leave with one. It might not stop her entirely, but hopefully she realizes that truth, too.
“Some of them might just expect things because you haven’t told them clearly.” He thinks back about that teacher at St. Hermelin, the absolutely impressive speech he’d given. There’s no way Tatsuya can match that. “Of course, I’m one to talk about actually talking to people, but—people can’t read your mind. If you don’t say anything, they might think you’re okay with the way things are, or even that you just don’t care.” He smirks, absent-mindedly playing with the lighter to gather his thoughts. “For the people who want the best for you, do your best to communicate, and as for the rest…screw them.”
She blinks, staring at her hands, and then smiles brilliantly. “I suppose I’ll start with you, Suou-san. You have no reason to care what I do with my life one way or the other, after all. I’m expected to inherit the inn, but it feels like a cage. I get to see strangers like you come and leave, and meanwhile all I get to do is stay here.”
He sees some of that restless desire to travel with the lack of a clear goal. It’s like staring into a mirror of ice.
“You have time to figure out what you’re doing. Talk it over with the people you trust.” It’s easy to say that you have to have everything figured out by senior year, but he suspects even for people who aren’t him, that’s not true—look at Mayuzumi-san, for one. She still wasn’t sure about her path, but she’d kept at it anyway. “If you need more advice, Jun—that is, Kashihara-san can be a lot more helpful. He’s good at listening.”
She smiles again, fleeting, the beauty of a snowflake doomed to melt, and tells him, “You’re a lot better at it than you think, yourself. Thank you for listening to the silly woes of a high-schooler, Suou-san.” She begins to get to her feet before shaking her head. “Well, I’m not sure if this has anything to do with your question, but I just remembered something. My friend Chie says there’s a rumor of the Midnight Channel. They say that if you stare into a switched off TV on a rainy night you’ll see your soulmate. Supposedly it works, she said, because someone saw Yamano-san. That’s the only thing I’ve heard.” She pats his shoulder and then leaves—but strangely, the frozen ice of the snowglobe doesn’t seem as harsh, anymore, despite the threat of more supernatural killings. It will return, he knows from experience, but perhaps talking to her wasn’t the wrong decision after all.
