madimpossibledreamer

Guanciale’s appearance is largely a pun based on the fact that the word is derived from guancia, the Italian word for ‘cheek’. Also, Fugo continues to swear.

Main Points:
Jojo's Bizarre Adventure/Buffy the Vampire Slayer AU
Chapter Summary: Buffy, Severin, and Fugo seek answers at the local Wolfram & Hart office.
Word Count: 1216
Rating: Teen (Buffy|Jojo's level violence)
Note: HERE THERE PROBABLY BE BUFFY/JJBA SPOILERS

         Fugo isn’t sure how to treat them, she can tell, because he keeps alternating between awkward silence and an incredibly detailed explanation of all the ways Passione could go after Wolfram & Hart. Both he and Severin continue to burn hot and cold at each other, largely as their impatience and then tempers get the better of them before they both remember they’re both supposed to be polite people. The architecture’s interesting, and Giles would be playing tour guide at this point, but Fugo’s not Giles by any means. She’s not actually surprised the criminal’s opting to talk about attempting to drive what could be just rivals if not for the fact that she’s pretty sure Giorno means well, though it is kind of a surprise he knows so much about the legal system (except, well, duh, it would make sense for the people breaking the law to know what it is and how it works) and mentions violence as an option as little as he does (meaning less than every other sentence, which is what she’d expected). Giles would be out of breath, what with all the hills. Fortunately, both of her current companions seem to be in good shape. On the other hand, it means they’re more likely to do damage if they do get to the point of actually hitting each other.
         “Okay, so I’ve seen some crime movies, and I’m still not clear on this.” Better she keep distracting them both because she’d really like her backup to remain in one piece. They take a turn down what seems like a blind alley, but from what little she’s seen several Italian cities are like that, close cities with cobblestones and staircases out of nowhere. Pretty, but confusing. “So, are you allowed to just kill whoever, or…?”
         Fugo flushes a little and can’t seem to decide whether he wants to be offended or embarrassed by the question. He finally settles on a confused glare. “Well, no, of course not.”
         “How does it actually work?” she prods. Okay, yeah, she’s curious and it’s a good distraction, but also she might be having a little fun with this, too.
         Fugo continues leading them unerringly. He might have claimed they didn’t have much to do with Tuscany, but at the very least Mr. Braniac over there memorized a map first.
         “Our Capo or the Don can give us permission. Otherwise it’s our discretion, as long as it’s for an objective such as carrying out the orders we’ve been given, but while wounds don’t actually tend to draw unwanted attention, dead bodies do. We have an understanding with the police, of course, but there’s only so much as a whole they can be asked to turn a blind eye towards. Individual policemen are one thing, but when the morgue and potentially reporters get involved, it’s much harder to deal with. And if innocent civilians get involved, well…Don Giovanna’s last extravagant show of power was last year when he had to discipline one of the Capos, Guanciale, when he had several innocent casualties and then dared to be flippant about it.” That’s an interesting way of thinking about it, and apparently he’s not exaggerating about the extravagant show of power because while he’s not going into detail his gesturing got more expressive. “I have a useful method of disposing of evidence easily…” he’s probably talking about his Stand, given the ash-piles she’d seen even in the shadows and underground, “…but others aren’t so lucky. Mista, for example, has to use his brain a lot more than he’s used to doing.” That is definitely a smirk.
         “So what about Wolfram & Hart?” Maybe she’s playing up the Valley Girl. Just a little bit. It’s fun, what can she say? Even as she’s keeping up, but she’s done the whole mixed message thing before.
         “Given how annoyed the Don has been, I’ve been waiting for him to deal with it himself.” Fugo shrugs. “If you’re asking, ‘have I killed before’, yes. I don’t regret it. I’ll probably do it again. I definitely wouldn’t have a crisis of conscious over one of those stronzi. Not with my Stand. Using it here would make me no better than Cioccolata, may he live the greatest sorrow, to remember joy in his wretchedness as he burns amidst his brethren trash.” Buffy blinks, trying for a second to figure out whether she actually did hear that in English, and Fugo shrugs. “I need to practice my English, too.” Actually, she has the feeling he’s messing with her back, given that his English so far has been a bit formal but otherwise perfect and he doesn’t even have an accent, but whatever, that’s fine. “At least I have my gun, for demons and vampires, and a knife for the humans. Is there a point to this?”
         “…I don’t kill humans.” It’s not part of her job description, and she absolutely doesn’t want to become Faith, even if she has gotten better.
         “Even if they’re trying to kill you?” Fugo asks, dumbfounded, hand twitching again.
“I won’t hesitate,” Severin declares darkly, but before she can respond…
         Fugo just disappears. It takes even her Slayer senses a second to understand what’s going on. He’s stuck a step behind them and he’s screaming.
         Instantly she freezes—her instincts say not to move, so she doesn’t. She throws out a hand, and to his credit Severin stops midstep, too. Together they turn to look at Fugo, shaking out of control like he’s been electrocuted, except there’s something white by his feet and what looks like electricity running over his arm, if electricity was little cut pieces of paper. It’s strange enough it has to be a Stand. Well, hopefully your little tutorial in fighting these things worked, Jotaro.
         There’s a slow, mocking clap, and she glances back to find a woman leaning casually against one of the buildings a small distance away. “Those are some pretty good instincts, Slayer.”
         Buffy manages a grin, because while the situation is somewhat dangerous now in that they don’t know how it works, their attacker seems to be underestimating her, too. “You know, I’m confused by all the people who try to use my title as an insult. Maybe it’s supposed to make me all insecure about the fact I might turn out like Faith, but all it does is remind me I’m badass and my enemies see me for what I am.” There’s something seethrough standing in the shadows between it and the next building. Probably the Stand. So she’s got both targets in sight, and one will affect the other, which is at least convenient.
         “You know, you’ve also got guts. Just like some friends of yours.” She glances at the bat in her hands. She’d embedded some glass in it somehow. That’s really going to hurt. If the woman gets a hit in, but at least she’s not a Slayer. She shouldn’t move as fast, and Buffy should also (theoretically) be more strong and durable, too. “Weren’t doing so well, last time I saw them.”
         Damn, Evil Lawyer Lady knows what she’s doing. She’s trying to get Buffy to lose her temper and charge, and it just might work, too, but she can at least be smart about this whole thing.