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madimpossibledreamera pun? in my chapter titles? who do you take me for-- it's more likely than you'd think
~dreamer~
Main Points:
Jojo's Bizarre Adventure/Buffy the Vampire Slayer AU
Chapter Summary: Buffy, Giorno, and another Stand User finally visit the Wolfram & Hart offices.
Word Count: 1292
Rating: Teen (nothing really obvious here, but definitely some hints at Passione-esque things)
Note: HERE THERE PROBABLY BE BUFFY/JJBA SPOILERS.
“Are these actually Capperi’s and Struffoli’s?” she asks, slightly nervous, and not even her voice is her own, which startles her. Khnum does work but it’s so much stranger than any of the other Stands she’s dealt with. She hasn’t even seen it, partially seethrough or not, and if they hadn’t insisted it was a Stand she’d wonder if it wasn’t some other power but they just see everything in terms of Stands. (Maybe it is. It’s really hard to be sure, here.) The expression he turns on her in response is carefully blank.
“Yes. It pays to have insurance, so to speak.” His tone is also blank, and the shiver remains. It’s not his own voice, either, but she can still tell it’s him—something about the deliberate way he speaks, maybe. Okay, she can see the scary mob boss from all those movies Dawn was obsessed with.
Oingo has made his face look vaguely look like Karloff’s rendition of Frankenstein’s monster (she would’ve said Frankenstein if not for Giles’ long lecture about it the one time they’d made that mistake) and he’s tall enough it works for him. He looks close enough to human that he can walk down the street and not be stopped, but he’d fit right in with the Wolfram & Hart crowd too. Probably.
Giorno—no, Capperi—tilts his head slightly to the side, standing easily on one foot. “I think you look like a Guanciale. I’ll introduce you as such.”
Oingo, or Guanciale, grunts, and Giorno—‘Capperi’—nods approvingly. “That will do.” He turns back to Buffy—Struffoli—again.
“Given that no one has confirmed their status, if she is his lover they are not demonstrative, so you aren’t required to treat me as anything other than your boss. Struffoli is certainly prone to violence, as you guessed, but she also acts entirely as a gentildonna. A femme fatale, in other words. That’s easy enough to keep yourself in character. As for Capperi, there are rumors that he employs the undead or has some sort of Stand involving the undead. He is a capo—ah, that’s right, I mentioned it before, but did not explain the term—lieutenant, I suppose—in charge of activities in Tuscany.” Giorno’s more expressive, at least with his hands. He’s usually fairly still, but not here.
“You said that Capperi would betray—er, Don Giovanna. But what does he have to offer to Wolfram & Hart?” she asks, trying to mimic the hand gestures a little, and he nods approvingly.
“You’ll see,” he responds, and—yeah, that’s definitely smug. “Is there anything else you wish to know at this time?”
“It probably would make sense if I’d insisted on a shopping spree to celebrate the deal you’re about to make, wouldn’t it?” Buffy—no, she needs to know and remember the name ‘Struffoli’, if she’s going to answer to it.
Giorno—no, ‘Capperi’—inclines his head, appearing pleased, and waits to see if she has anything else to say. When she does not, he states firmly, “It is time to go make our introductions.”
He walks slightly slower, probably trying to fit his middle-aged image, and ‘Struffoli’ and ‘Guanciale’ fall in line behind him.
The building itself appears like an average fancy attorney’s office (according to what she knows from watching shows anyway). Fancy columns, fancy materials, fancy everything. Buffy—‘Struffoli’—doesn’t stare. She—the other she, her character—has seen these things a thousand times and isn’t easily impressed by such things. They walk in with confidence and directly to the reception desk, ignoring the waiting chairs entirely. “My name is Capperi. If you tell your higher-ups, I’m sure that they will see the importance of a meeting.” Rather than sitting, ‘Capperi’ waits, standing, by the desk.
The receptionist looks distinctly uncomfortable, but goes ahead and makes the call anyway. The rest of the people waiting glare and mumble in their direction until ‘Guanciale’ giggles menacingly, at which point they all quiet and do their best to not even glance in their direction.
“Signor Capperi, sorry for the wait,” a voice smoothly joins them. “I am Sawyers; this is Francis. We would’ve prepared for your coming had we known you were planning to visit.”
“Any communication to warn you of the possibility could have been intercepted,” ‘Capperi’ responds haughtily. “I suggest any further talk wait until we are alone.”
“Very good, sir,” Francis agrees. “Follow us to our office.”
They do; ‘Struffoli’ and ‘Guanciale’ trailing after ‘Capperi’ as if they’ve been doing it all their lives. ‘Capperi’ makes himself comfortable in the chair as if it belongs to him. As if all of this belongs to him. Buffy—‘Struffoli’—makes an executive decision and also sits. ‘Guanciale’ stands behind ‘Capperi’s’ chair, laughing creepily to himself. ‘Capperi’ pokes ‘Guanciale’ with an elbow, and he quiets.
Francis settles behind the desk, while Sawyer stands, twitchy and awkward. (Maybe he’s ready to grab whatever paperwork might be needed, or maybe he’s just nervous?) “I would like to make it known that it is a great honor to have you in our office, Signor Capperi, but I have to ask—is there a particular reason you’ve come to one of our England offices?”
‘Capperi’ responds instantly. “All of your known offices in Italy are being watched, and Struffoli wanted to compare the shopping experience in London and Roma.”
“It doesn’t match the experience in Italy, of course, and these…” ‘Struffoli’ raises one thin, dark eyebrow at her jacket sleeve, “…are subpar. Your tailors don’t even know how to do a proper fitting,” she adds with a smirk, channeling her inner Queen Cordy as much as possible. “Perhaps you might have a few suggestions?”
Sawyers pales a little. “Of—of course, Signora Struffoli.”
“The proposal I bring is clear enough, but I want to be very explicit, as I know you care about such things. I’m sick of serving under a little shit. I want my due, and I know we can make a mutually beneficial arrangement. I want Wolfram & Hart to help me take over Passione, and in return I can bring work and end the harassment of your employees in Italy.” ‘Capperi’…sounds vicious and power-hungry and is even more expressive with his hands.
Sawyer smiles, still twitchy. “It will be a relief for our Italian offices to be able to operate again. You might not be aware, but your previous Boss had an arrangement with Wolfram & Hart.”
“Previous Boss?” ‘Capperi’ asks, sounding surprised, and Francis looks sympathetic.
“Oh, yeah, that’s right. Giovanna claimed he had been the Boss the entire time, but if he’s human he’s too young, and Passione started operating very differently. Changing our contact is one thing, but changing the entire way they do business…that’s something different.”
“Used to be a shy, squirrely little dude. Wasn’t assertive until one of us made a crack about him failing his Boss. Cracked McNamara’s head wide open. Haven’t seen him in a while, though. Pretty much the same time as the operation changed.” Sawyer’s one to be talking about ‘squirrely’, but given his words, maybe shy doesn’t work as a descriptor for him.
“So you don’t think that girl is his daughter,” ‘Capperi’ states thoughtfully.
“They look absolutely nothing alike,” Francis curls a lip in scorn.
‘Capperi’ hums and doesn’t respond.
“You know something,” Sawyer suggests, and ‘Capperi’ just smiles.
~dreamer~
Main Points:
Jojo's Bizarre Adventure/Buffy the Vampire Slayer AU
Chapter Summary: Buffy, Giorno, and another Stand User finally visit the Wolfram & Hart offices.
Word Count: 1292
Rating: Teen (nothing really obvious here, but definitely some hints at Passione-esque things)
Note: HERE THERE PROBABLY BE BUFFY/JJBA SPOILERS.
Giorno pulls out a ring and a necklace from the striped suit and offers the necklace casually to her. After she accepts it, he slips the finger on his own hand. Buffy feels a shiver up her spine. It shouldn’t be all that odd. He might’ve just bought it, just like he’d obviously bought the clothes, but it still feels…
“Are these actually Capperi’s and Struffoli’s?” she asks, slightly nervous, and not even her voice is her own, which startles her. Khnum does work but it’s so much stranger than any of the other Stands she’s dealt with. She hasn’t even seen it, partially seethrough or not, and if they hadn’t insisted it was a Stand she’d wonder if it wasn’t some other power but they just see everything in terms of Stands. (Maybe it is. It’s really hard to be sure, here.) The expression he turns on her in response is carefully blank.
“Yes. It pays to have insurance, so to speak.” His tone is also blank, and the shiver remains. It’s not his own voice, either, but she can still tell it’s him—something about the deliberate way he speaks, maybe. Okay, she can see the scary mob boss from all those movies Dawn was obsessed with.
Oingo has made his face look vaguely look like Karloff’s rendition of Frankenstein’s monster (she would’ve said Frankenstein if not for Giles’ long lecture about it the one time they’d made that mistake) and he’s tall enough it works for him. He looks close enough to human that he can walk down the street and not be stopped, but he’d fit right in with the Wolfram & Hart crowd too. Probably.
Giorno—no, Capperi—tilts his head slightly to the side, standing easily on one foot. “I think you look like a Guanciale. I’ll introduce you as such.”
Oingo, or Guanciale, grunts, and Giorno—‘Capperi’—nods approvingly. “That will do.” He turns back to Buffy—Struffoli—again.
“Given that no one has confirmed their status, if she is his lover they are not demonstrative, so you aren’t required to treat me as anything other than your boss. Struffoli is certainly prone to violence, as you guessed, but she also acts entirely as a gentildonna. A femme fatale, in other words. That’s easy enough to keep yourself in character. As for Capperi, there are rumors that he employs the undead or has some sort of Stand involving the undead. He is a capo—ah, that’s right, I mentioned it before, but did not explain the term—lieutenant, I suppose—in charge of activities in Tuscany.” Giorno’s more expressive, at least with his hands. He’s usually fairly still, but not here.
“You said that Capperi would betray—er, Don Giovanna. But what does he have to offer to Wolfram & Hart?” she asks, trying to mimic the hand gestures a little, and he nods approvingly.
“You’ll see,” he responds, and—yeah, that’s definitely smug. “Is there anything else you wish to know at this time?”
“It probably would make sense if I’d insisted on a shopping spree to celebrate the deal you’re about to make, wouldn’t it?” Buffy—no, she needs to know and remember the name ‘Struffoli’, if she’s going to answer to it.
Giorno—no, ‘Capperi’—inclines his head, appearing pleased, and waits to see if she has anything else to say. When she does not, he states firmly, “It is time to go make our introductions.”
He walks slightly slower, probably trying to fit his middle-aged image, and ‘Struffoli’ and ‘Guanciale’ fall in line behind him.
The building itself appears like an average fancy attorney’s office (according to what she knows from watching shows anyway). Fancy columns, fancy materials, fancy everything. Buffy—‘Struffoli’—doesn’t stare. She—the other she, her character—has seen these things a thousand times and isn’t easily impressed by such things. They walk in with confidence and directly to the reception desk, ignoring the waiting chairs entirely. “My name is Capperi. If you tell your higher-ups, I’m sure that they will see the importance of a meeting.” Rather than sitting, ‘Capperi’ waits, standing, by the desk.
The receptionist looks distinctly uncomfortable, but goes ahead and makes the call anyway. The rest of the people waiting glare and mumble in their direction until ‘Guanciale’ giggles menacingly, at which point they all quiet and do their best to not even glance in their direction.
“Signor Capperi, sorry for the wait,” a voice smoothly joins them. “I am Sawyers; this is Francis. We would’ve prepared for your coming had we known you were planning to visit.”
“Any communication to warn you of the possibility could have been intercepted,” ‘Capperi’ responds haughtily. “I suggest any further talk wait until we are alone.”
“Very good, sir,” Francis agrees. “Follow us to our office.”
They do; ‘Struffoli’ and ‘Guanciale’ trailing after ‘Capperi’ as if they’ve been doing it all their lives. ‘Capperi’ makes himself comfortable in the chair as if it belongs to him. As if all of this belongs to him. Buffy—‘Struffoli’—makes an executive decision and also sits. ‘Guanciale’ stands behind ‘Capperi’s’ chair, laughing creepily to himself. ‘Capperi’ pokes ‘Guanciale’ with an elbow, and he quiets.
Francis settles behind the desk, while Sawyer stands, twitchy and awkward. (Maybe he’s ready to grab whatever paperwork might be needed, or maybe he’s just nervous?) “I would like to make it known that it is a great honor to have you in our office, Signor Capperi, but I have to ask—is there a particular reason you’ve come to one of our England offices?”
‘Capperi’ responds instantly. “All of your known offices in Italy are being watched, and Struffoli wanted to compare the shopping experience in London and Roma.”
“It doesn’t match the experience in Italy, of course, and these…” ‘Struffoli’ raises one thin, dark eyebrow at her jacket sleeve, “…are subpar. Your tailors don’t even know how to do a proper fitting,” she adds with a smirk, channeling her inner Queen Cordy as much as possible. “Perhaps you might have a few suggestions?”
Sawyers pales a little. “Of—of course, Signora Struffoli.”
“The proposal I bring is clear enough, but I want to be very explicit, as I know you care about such things. I’m sick of serving under a little shit. I want my due, and I know we can make a mutually beneficial arrangement. I want Wolfram & Hart to help me take over Passione, and in return I can bring work and end the harassment of your employees in Italy.” ‘Capperi’…sounds vicious and power-hungry and is even more expressive with his hands.
Sawyer smiles, still twitchy. “It will be a relief for our Italian offices to be able to operate again. You might not be aware, but your previous Boss had an arrangement with Wolfram & Hart.”
“Previous Boss?” ‘Capperi’ asks, sounding surprised, and Francis looks sympathetic.
“Oh, yeah, that’s right. Giovanna claimed he had been the Boss the entire time, but if he’s human he’s too young, and Passione started operating very differently. Changing our contact is one thing, but changing the entire way they do business…that’s something different.”
“Used to be a shy, squirrely little dude. Wasn’t assertive until one of us made a crack about him failing his Boss. Cracked McNamara’s head wide open. Haven’t seen him in a while, though. Pretty much the same time as the operation changed.” Sawyer’s one to be talking about ‘squirrely’, but given his words, maybe shy doesn’t work as a descriptor for him.
“So you don’t think that girl is his daughter,” ‘Capperi’ states thoughtfully.
“They look absolutely nothing alike,” Francis curls a lip in scorn.
‘Capperi’ hums and doesn’t respond.
“You know something,” Sawyer suggests, and ‘Capperi’ just smiles.
