Idem Debitum

[madimpossibledreamer]

The idea here for the title is that Yosuke in this universe is a law nerd and has done a decent number of civil cases—so he’d know debt terms. The debt remains the same; i.e. he doesn’t think he’s paid it off or that the terms of the contract should change and no amount of ‘you’re not at fault’ judgments from others will make him believe it. I also considered some ‘representing yourself’ terms, since he’s essentially the one putting himself on trial, but.
I don’t know what it is about this specific song that makes me go ‘this is the Verdict reasoning/putting together the pieces/thinking song’, but. It is what it is.
he's not kidding about Kanji's fashion, btw, man's one of the most well-dressed yakuza around.  Unlike his counterpart he doesn't have a full gold suit and switches it up, but if you see one of the most eye-catching shirts particularly if it's got some sort of metallic pattern on it it's probably Kanji.  (Honestly, he might be making one-of-a-kind shirts himself because he's awesome.)  Not over the top, not gaudy, but he absolutely would fit right in at a nightclub.

Main Points:
Persona 4 Verdict AU (P4/Judgment Fusion)
Chapter Summary: How everyone in Verdict ends up where they are.
Word Count: 2330
Rating: Teen
Naoto is nonbinary or trans, Yosuke is disaster bi, so basically canon.

 

         Yosuke thinks about it, what would have happened if his parents hadn’t been killed. He isn’t so egotistical to think he could’ve been the sole cause, no, but sometimes it just takes one more supportive voice to make the difference, and, well.
         He might’ve been just enough to turn the tide. Instead, Seta ended up here, and there are a few moments where he seems almost his old self, but—that’s it, they’re only moments.
         Maybe he became a detective because dealing with other people’s problems is so much easier than dealing with his own. Sure, it also felt like a way to finally pay Naoto-kun back for all his help, but still.
         Shirogane had actually made a powerpoint presentation. He hadn’t actually presented it, just sent it over in an email, and both of them pretended it had never happened but from the way he was marginally more cheerful after that probably communicated his thanks equally as well.
         He’s nosy, although Shirogane’d framed it as ‘naturally curious’. He’s not much good at leaving things alone, always poking and prodding, even where it’s unwanted. He’s quick on his feet and with his thoughts. He’s genuinely observant (“more than most police officers I work with,” Naoto-kun had said, though he assumes that’s more a means of letting out steam about incompetence than anything to do with natural talent on his part) and doesn’t tend to write off conclusions as outlandish, no matter where his making connections leads him.
         His customer service skills, learnt from Junes, at first (no matter how much it makes him wince to dig those back out of the closet like the thoughts are going to bite him in the ass, he needs to get over this shit already) and honed in his bartending job actually serve him pretty well, and between that and his cobbled together martial arts moves (honed specifically by sparring with Satonaka and grinning through the bruises and, on the occasion she’d landed a particularly painful blow, whining at her until she feels guilty enough to treat him to a bowl at Aiya’s) he was pretty good at dealing with complications that come up. To be fair, he often used those in the wrong situations, trying to sweet talk his way out of fights and fighting when he really should know better, but then, he still hadn’t grown out of that phase where he mouthed off to Sanada-san way too often, but sometimes his brain would get ahead of him, and at least the ex-yakuza could come to his rescue these days.
         He blended in, too. He’s gotten a little resigned to being mistaken for a third-rate host, but then, it’s not like he doesn’t see the point. It’s not like what he usually wears is the fancy host suit, but his haircut definitely is close, and he’d get mistaken more often if he was still dying his hair, probably. And he’s seen ‘casual’ hosts, say, those on their way to a date with a girl, and some of them do ‘dress down’, try to look less professional to try to sell the fantasy. It’s his jacket, probably, but he misses the old white fur one he’d had in Inaba and like hell is he getting rid of that. Besides, as annoying as being dismissed is, it’s useful.
         Shirogane had also tried to make the last point sound not-bad, but there’s no real good way to put that he’s disorganized, and it’s not, exactly, he’d rambled on the page, but he is certainly less orderly than is expected in the courtroom, but as a private eye it fits.
         Personally, Yosuke likes to call it ‘controlled chaos’, like playing jazz, a private little improv session all his own. It’s not like Shirogane’s wrong. It’d come in handy in court, too, his doing the unexpected and sticking it out when most attorneys would have folded allowing him to get that one single win, but, well.
         Seta had hated that. So had the judge, the police, and, well—maybe they had a point, after all, just looking at what came of it. Here, he can still fight for justice, for doing the right thing, but it’s not all on his shoulders, so if he messes up it isn’t as big a deal. Here, it doesn’t matter if he’s imperfect or not the best judge of character, because all he has to do is look for evidence and then put it into someone else’s hands.
         That’s the thing, he supposes, the big difference. If he has to give a conclusion, he can get a second opinion and it’s no big deal.
         So he can gather evidence, like the fact that in general, Seta’s like he’d been at the beginning of that high school year, cold and closed off and focused oh-so-strongly on results, but sometimes he won’t be. For all his poise, he can sometimes say something that suggests he cares, before pretending that he’d done nothing of the sort. Yosuke still doesn’t know what to make of the hour long lecture in which Seta had yelled at him about getting a guilty man off the hook before claiming it hadn’t been Yosuke’s fault and then indicating that he should absolutely stay in law, which, holy hell, what the absolute hell was going on there? The man was a master of mixed signals, and Yosuke was so over it.
         Satonaka had (briefly, probably a slip of the tongue) mentioned how devastated Seta was when he’d found out Yosuke wasn’t coming to school anymore, the frantic look in his eyes when he’d explained to Satonaka what his uncle had mentioned—the Hanamuras oh god—before remembering she probably hadn’t intended to ever say any of those things.
         She hadn’t meant to dredge up painful memories or make Yosuke feel bad—and hell, it’s not like it was even his fault. Even if he’d wanted to stay, the Ibukas wouldn’t have let him, and if he’d run away back to Inaba to finish high school, he would’ve been caught. Getting in touch with anyone was such a risk, and he didn’t want to pull any of them into his own mess.
         It doesn’t take a detective to notice the connection, but it helps—the fact that the one person a shy teenage boy had begun opening up to about familial expectations disappears on him before he can even work out his feelings completely. Or that, for the first time, some jealousy might have crept in from the other side—because Yosuke had done it. Yosuke had escaped the chains of expectation Seta had been dealing with his whole life, seemingly effortlessly, and he probably seemed happy, too. And, true, he was happier than he would’ve been if he’d stayed, but that doesn’t mean that it’s easy, that he didn’t suffer, that he’s actually happy most days. It just means his soul didn’t die quite as much, that he doesn’t hate himself as much as he would have if he’d stayed.
         Yosuke gets it. How could he not? But he’s not subjecting himself to more cutting remarks by forcing himself into Seta’s life. He’s acknowledging the crush—because he can, now, he’d even approached Tatsumi and apologized, half expecting the well-dressed yakuza to break something, probably him, and come away with the realization that while his kohai didn’t particularly like him, he didn’t hate him either—but he’s not going to act on it, no, thanks Satonaka, it’s not pathetic, distracting her by stealing a dumpling while she’s trying to lecture him. He’s being perfectly polite and not avoiding him, exactly, that’d be childish, but keeping his distance.
         He has a crush on Seta and that suit is far too flattering, and if he didn’t know better he’d say it was picked specifically to try to gain an upper hand in court. But, realistically, it’s not going to go anywhere, so there’s no point in stomping on every last remaining rusted link of their bond. Seta is heterosexual, and it doesn’t matter if that’s by inclination or choice, ignoring that won’t get him anywhere.
         He’s a pathetic failure whose mistake got an innocent woman killed, and that haunts him every day—but he’s got to keep smiling and doing what he can to help out others. It’s not like it’ll make up for it, but somewhere along the line he ended up with people who cared for him, and he’s not going to let his pain drag them down. And if he helps out clients with their cases, he’s not a total waste of space.
         He’s poor and has no love life and already failed in one career and hasn’t made much of a showing in the second, but hey. His cousin is an utter weirdo for having come all the way from America to track him down, but so what? Teddie means well, and while Yosuke’s detective training is absolutely no help in understanding what’s going on in the boy’s head, he doesn’t have to understand to return the love and affection.
         He helps Dojima-chan track down a stalker that she hadn’t wanted her own father to know about. Kujikawa is an amazing friend and it never ceases to astonish him that they’re so casually close and she just…refuses to explain that to anyone. He will never cease to thank her for the Bluetooth headphones, even if wireless sound just can’t match the quality of wired, because they’re so useful for staying in touch with his investigation partners and he can play some music sometimes when he needs to soothe his raw nerves. He does wonder sometimes if this is how Shirogane felt when he’d volunteered to help with his stuff, because it’s strange dealing with Kujikawa’s enthusiastic and slightly worrying help and ever-increasingly wild and unrealistic plans to catch the perp.
         He tries not to show a deer-in-the-headlights expression at the Joker of Kashihara as the man asks for help finding a lost family heirloom ‘meant for Tacchi’. He tries not to think about the possible bloodstains on the Kamurocho legend’s bare feet or the ladies’ kimono and flowery hairclip and makeup and the implications about the Joker and the Dragon’s relationships. Even a rough investigation is nice, though, because he doesn’t have to think about any of his own woes, thinking about solving other people’s problems instead. He might not have an actual bed or even a futon, but he can snuggle with his UFO catcher prizes on the sofa in his office and feel just a little less alone. Whenever he can’t fully chase away the dark thoughts, he can go sing karaoke and get drunk, or dance himself into exhaustion when he thinks he couldn’t otherwise sleep.
         Amagi or Satonaka will force him to eat, if he forgets. Even Aragaki will do the same, despite hating his guts. (Amagi has started making up ghost stories involving him starving to death in his office and then haunting everyone. She’d find it amusing and takes care to say she wouldn’t miss him because he’d still be there, but other renters might mind, and then goes into a hyena laughter cackling fit. He’s pretty sure half the powers she makes up for his theoretical ghost self come from manga or maybe games, but is glad in a bemused way someone’s getting something out of his pain, at least.) Sanada-san’s a great listener, and like Satonaka is a great exercise-slash-sparring partner (and all around partner, though he’s not exactly built for logic puzzles, which is fine, because Yosuke’s pretty good at that and when he’s not he can consult people who are even better).
         He’s pretty sure at this point he doesn’t have to keep giving Shirogane updates, but he’s kept doing them anyway because if he accidentally rambles how grey eyes are hot Shirogane won’t actually have any advice because romance is not his strong suit, and it’s nice someone actually cares to give him that kind of…well. It’s not scheduled, because neither of them have that kind of occupation, but he’ll start to get antsy if it’s approaching two weeks, and his usual response of “It’s great to hear from you, Yosuke-kun” has to be taken at face value because Shirogane can’t lie. Avoid saying the truth, maybe, confused by feelings, absolutely, so when he does actually express them, it has to be the truth.
         And they’re great detective buddies. Any time, day or night, they can call each other for a second opinion, which is a great safety net and really does help every single time—and not just for solving the case, but for giving each other some sort of validation they sure aren’t getting from the cops.
         Dojima-san will help in his own way, usually by trying to get word of his detective agency out there, and Kirijo-san isn’t usually…warm, persay, but they’ll have deep discussions on music, and he’s not too into tea parties but when it comes to Kirijo-san he can just sit and be and not feel like he wants to vibrate out of his skin or that he should be doing something. There’s usually a bento waiting, although Yosuke isn’t self-centered enough to think it’s always for him. He’s pretty sure, sometimes, it’s for Kirijo Mitsuru-san, although he has yet to figure out whether she’s the boss of her own gang or is trying to get further into the Kirijo Family as a female yakuza or both and doesn’t want to pry. And Kirijo-san will often have CDs, sometimes pretty obscure ones, he practically insists Yosuke rip before returning. Captain Sakaya, pretty and deadly with his long hair and gold chain necklace, will glower, but he’s usually appeased enough not to make a scene when Yosuke approaches him with a polite demeanor, even though both of them know it’s more formality than anything.
         It’s not a perfect life, really, but it’s also not the worst, and it’s his, and it works.