madimpossibledreamer | Prince of Persia: Sands of Time Game Review/Commentary 58

Seriously, what is wrong with you? We’re gonna fail again.

You know what? I’m going to see if you can’t—nope, ‘kay. That was just a test. Just testing, folks. (I spot the reference. Does anyone else?)

Well, you’re the moron who’s not actually cooperating in any way, shape, or form, so that’s your own fault. It’s got nothing to do with me.

What are you even doing? Why are you parkouring? Why are you parkouring the lever?

Prince, what in the world are you?? Apparently that doesn’t kill me.

What are you doing? Pff.

Now you’re just failing on purpose, Prince. I realize I left you alone for a significant amount of time. It was not actually my choice in the matter, so I would appreciate a little more cooperation if you could possibly help it.

I’m just going to jump back before the second jump…seriously, what is wrong. What is wrong with you, Prince?

*sigh* (I swear I can hear my past self quietly seething here.)

This might be a rage episode. ‘Cause I’m 90% certain that the game is being glitchy through no fault of mine.

*sigh* I’ll look it up again. (No research music, either. Just angry humming.)

Oh. Am I standing in the slightly wrong position? That might actually be the case. Maybe?

What? No, I’m….mmm. Complete end. Seriously, what?

I might need help on this again. Because I don’t—what? What even was that, Prince? Just randomly jump toward the camera? Thanks.

Because I have a hard time believing my timing is off, because I have my timing correct for the jumping in the other part, but somehow it’s off… *sigh*

I mean, if all else fails I can maybe reload the save, but I’ll probably be stuck on this part for a bit, which sucks. Because I’m so close to the end and I want to finish.

…Yes, Prince, that is exactly the correct direction.

Really? Prince? Really?

Fine. I’ll go redo this. And jump into the wall because why not?

Prince, I hate you sometimes. (…I have never heard my voice this monotone before, except when I’m sick. Holy cow this ticked me off apparently. More than the Sand King fight, which just sort of broke me mentally. Here it’s actually making me feel emotions other than insanity and despair.)

Okay, now you’re just slapping the wall to make fun of me. Look, I could be playing Devil May Cry instead.

Apparently when I get ragey I just get really really quiet. That’s an interesting thing to know.

I hate you so much Prince sometimes. Actually, for all I know I could be the Dark Prince.

Why was I falling? I think that’s the camera being rude, but.

Bye. That’s not how it happened. [Prince]

I’m going to pause recording and probably go get help because I’m…I’m so done. I am angry and for goodness’ sake. I play games to have a good time. …I came here to have a good time and I just feel attacked. (I didn’t bother to record any of the interim, probably because we needed to concentrate.)

Okay, we’re back. We’ve somehow found Farah; I don’t know how.

You were awesome, thank you. I could not have done it without you and I mean that in every single sense. Yeah, well… {Roommate}

Hello! Give me visions and lemme save! Because I need to save! (O…kay, I sound manic here.) Oh, there are some funny visions. {Roommate}

We find…we find an elevator? We apparently find an—we find multiple elevators. “Oh, you have an ascending room.” Yes, yes we do. {Roommate}

We only made three percent. Done. I’ll start the story from here next time. [Prince]

We—hi. I feel like I’ve missed something. Again. Hi. It’s all right. It’s me. (Farah) Yeah, I don’t trust you, but I— We’re going to rewind time to see what you did to me, man. No, nothing? Okay. {Roommate} Yeah.

…How do you know this? This isn’t your castle. How do you know these things? This is my castle. {Roommate}

No, it isn’t. She’s from… Duh duh duhhhhh…. {Roommate} She’s from India. This is the place of him and some friend of his father’s…

…Prince, what are you doing? Look, I’m irritated and you two discussing minutiae when we’re trying to save the world. {Roommate} I mean yes, but also…

…actually I don’t know why I’m doing this because I think a) we had full and b) I’m probably not going any further today, but… (We managed to make it out with full sands? Were we performing black magic back there in the past because I am impressed.) Well, I mean… {Roommate} ‘Cause it is almost 9 which is the time I set myself.

(Sorry about talking over you, roomie…) Look at that beautiful sky.

Well, Prince, you know, it’s a good thing you’ve decided not to commit suicide. {Roommate} Well, we’ve made it through that utterly irritating three percent of the game, so there’s that.

I honestly, well…no. I’m not willing to bet that there’s not something more annoying. {Roommate} Yeah. But at the same time I kind of am. {Roommate}

The thing is, sometime soon we’re hitting major boss battle with the Vizier, who is apparently named the same thing as the Vizier in Aladdin, but this came first, so I’m wondering if there’s some connection there or it’s just a name. Oh, almost certainly. {Roommate}

It’s…You know, it’s kind of interesting, right? {Roommate} Yeah? I’m honestly willing to bet that we just got through one of the hardest if not the hardest sections of the game. {Roommate} I would agree.

(Glances at future installments, laughs and chuckles at our naiveté…though if the controls had functioned correctly probably this wouldn’t have been the case and apparently the port is just super glitchy.)

Because at least every other place has not made me go complete rage-silent. (Roommate chuckles at that.) I was saying nothing but you would feel me stewing and glaring at the screen. Yeah. {Roommate}

Prince… I was happy you decided to work with us. {Roommate} Yes. Let’s keep this going. {Roommate} Yes.

I’m super happy you decided to work with us…stop glaring at us like that. (We both laugh) Look at that expression, though. Well, it’s his standard expression. He’s got resting, um. Prince face. {Roommate} (We laugh again) Notice he glanced down and looked away from me. {Roommate} Yeah. ‘I’m just going to mess with the floor now.

I’m gonna go—oh, look, cool, statues. Yeah. {Roommate} That you can’t actually look at when you get too close. That’s great.

Yeah. The statue design is…not quite…on. {Roommate} Yeah, it’s kind of blocky. Yeah, it’s not… {Roommate} The rest of the architecture is good, but the statues are kinda blocky. Yeah. {Roommate}